So I'm broke again. I had to shelve the credit cards till I pay down my Visa. In the meantime - I'll enjoy my BD and TKD classes as that will be my socialization for the rest of the year.
It's good that I am broke though, I was spending like a fool. And now I can focus on doing all the fun things that I've wanted to do all summer that don't really require funds (or much). Plus I can take a break from drinking - between CO and celebrating this and that, things got a little hectic. The last thing I want to do is get caught up in a drinking cycle again. Even though it's less dramatic than it was in my past, it's still beginning to wear on me. I just don't recover like I used to. Plus I tend to have more fun when I'm not drinking. But it's like once I start, I make a night out of it. I am getting better at only having a few drinks, but honestly that's only when I have something planned the next day. Otherwise it's like a free for all (when I let it). So here's to sober weekends and trying new things!
All the things I want to do this summer:
1. Space Needle
2. Zoo
3. Underground tour
4. Ride the Ducks
5. Ballard locks
6. Aquarium
7. Sea fair
8. Superman
9. Pirates of the Caribbean 2
10. Putt putt/go-karts/paintball
11. Cosmic/late night bowling
12. Botanic gardens/arboretum
13. Settlers of Catan game night
14. Canada
15. Olympic peninsula
16. Dessert night
17. Casino night
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Friday, June 23, 2006
Still No Pics
Ugh - there was little to no coverage of the parade, so I will have to wait till next week to pick up the picture cd at Delilah's party.
In the meantime - I've been busy at work trying to close my corps for April and May. I even took work home with me to complete on Sunday. Good times. I haven't worked out at all this week, mostly cause I have been resting and enjoying not going full blast. My class sucks, I started an online revolt. I don't like the teacher at all and feel very disappointed in this whole experience. I was really looking forward to the government/nonprofit accounting class. Oh well.
In other news I will start going to Tae Kwon Do w/ HG next week. I'm really looking forward to that. Not only will it be a fun way to lose weight, but I think it will help give me the balance in my mental/spiritual life that has been missing since I stopped doing yoga. HG and I also start a new 10 week belly dance course with LR and Delilah. I'm glad she's doing that with me, it will be fun. I will still go to 24 Hour Fitness w/ RB too, and now it looks like HG got a membership there too, so it will be a happy little threesome again. I need to work out, I've been a glutton all week. Speaking of, Ben & Jerry's has new mini-tubs of ice cream. I call it guilt free ice cream eating. It's about a perfect serving size! And it's a cute little mini-tub. Safeway has em on sale 10 for $10 - highly recommended.
It was nice having Steven in town, we have so much fun! He's coming in town again next weekend. Maybe this time we can actually decorate. :-)
Right now it's about 11:15 on Friday night and I'm kinda tired, so I'm sure this post is all shades of wacky. We've been watching Dane Cook (hottie!) and laughing our tails off. Tomorrow is naked spa w/ HG for her b-day and then drunken pottery. Well, maybe not drunken, but painting pottery at least. Should be a fun way of celebrating her special day. Sunday will be spent closing SWC for May and doing homework since I will be at TKD (Tae Kwon Do) on Weds and Fri and BD (belly dance) on Tues. Thursday is my day off from everything so that leaves Sun, Mon, and Sat for homework. I hate this class. Are we there yet?! Only 3 more classes and then I will have my degree!! WHOO HOO!!
In the meantime - I've been busy at work trying to close my corps for April and May. I even took work home with me to complete on Sunday. Good times. I haven't worked out at all this week, mostly cause I have been resting and enjoying not going full blast. My class sucks, I started an online revolt. I don't like the teacher at all and feel very disappointed in this whole experience. I was really looking forward to the government/nonprofit accounting class. Oh well.
In other news I will start going to Tae Kwon Do w/ HG next week. I'm really looking forward to that. Not only will it be a fun way to lose weight, but I think it will help give me the balance in my mental/spiritual life that has been missing since I stopped doing yoga. HG and I also start a new 10 week belly dance course with LR and Delilah. I'm glad she's doing that with me, it will be fun. I will still go to 24 Hour Fitness w/ RB too, and now it looks like HG got a membership there too, so it will be a happy little threesome again. I need to work out, I've been a glutton all week. Speaking of, Ben & Jerry's has new mini-tubs of ice cream. I call it guilt free ice cream eating. It's about a perfect serving size! And it's a cute little mini-tub. Safeway has em on sale 10 for $10 - highly recommended.
It was nice having Steven in town, we have so much fun! He's coming in town again next weekend. Maybe this time we can actually decorate. :-)
Right now it's about 11:15 on Friday night and I'm kinda tired, so I'm sure this post is all shades of wacky. We've been watching Dane Cook (hottie!) and laughing our tails off. Tomorrow is naked spa w/ HG for her b-day and then drunken pottery. Well, maybe not drunken, but painting pottery at least. Should be a fun way of celebrating her special day. Sunday will be spent closing SWC for May and doing homework since I will be at TKD (Tae Kwon Do) on Weds and Fri and BD (belly dance) on Tues. Thursday is my day off from everything so that leaves Sun, Mon, and Sat for homework. I hate this class. Are we there yet?! Only 3 more classes and then I will have my degree!! WHOO HOO!!
Monday, June 19, 2006
Friday, June 16, 2006
THE Weekend is Almost Here!
I can't wait! In a mere hours, the weekend will start! And while it will be nonstop, it's going to be a blast. First I'll get some piratey gear from Champion, then get my nails/feet cleaned up, tanning, eyebrows waxed, and then off to HG's for a quiet evening. Then Dane and Steven will meet up with us and we will park my car in Fremont and catch dinner somewhere down there. Then off to bed.
Saturday - early wake up call, get ready, go to parade. Parade. After parade party. Pirate party. Home.
Sunday - decorate reading room w/ Steven - thank Gawd I'll have his help. Alki beach. Kolbeh.
I think I might ask to come in a little late on Monday morning. I already owe 3 hours though, so I don't know....Other than that, things are going well. I'm so excited!!
You should see Dane's hair, OMG - it's crazy! I"ll have to post a pic. He had to sleep in a shower cap last night - H-O-T!
Saturday - early wake up call, get ready, go to parade. Parade. After parade party. Pirate party. Home.
Sunday - decorate reading room w/ Steven - thank Gawd I'll have his help. Alki beach. Kolbeh.
I think I might ask to come in a little late on Monday morning. I already owe 3 hours though, so I don't know....Other than that, things are going well. I'm so excited!!
You should see Dane's hair, OMG - it's crazy! I"ll have to post a pic. He had to sleep in a shower cap last night - H-O-T!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Severed Friendships Part Deux
This is funny - I've just put a post up about severed friendships (SF) and how I felt about losing communication with a few people in my life over misunderstandings and this and that and now I'm going to put up a post about another severed friendship....that hasn't severed yet. Interesting indeed.
Here's the weird part, with the two aforementioned SF's, I was not really directly involved with the severing, one out of cowardness and the other just sort of happened, with no ill words passing directly between us. An indirect severance, if you will. This time it is different. This time there has been damage done directly to me.
The scoop - without getting too messy, I know this person has wittingly and/or unwittingly talked MAD sh*t about Dane and I and how we supposedly pressured, coerced, manipulated, and oppressed this person. I know this person then vehomently denied having ever said those things when called to the carpet. I know that this person has wrecked the same havoc on a few of my very close friends after leaving my (and Dane's) life an absolute mess. I know this person thinks they are doing the right thing. I know this person has absolutely no idea what they have done.
You can't trash a person, use them for all they are willing to give you, borrow extensive amounts of time, money, resources, etc. from them without some sort of recourse. At some point there needs to be a reconciliation or comeuppance! After the better part of the year with little to no effort made and then at that only when begged, I vote this person off the island. Comeuppance for you!
So it is with that that I will knowingly and willingly severe another friendship. I wish this person the best, we've had some GREAT times together that I will always look back on fondly. But call this person a life long friend, I do not.
*sigh* I hate doing this. But I also hate how toxic people can be. I can't believe after all we've shared, and all I've done for this person that it would come to this. I can just see it now - "I was going to _____!" "I told ____ that I did ____ and that made up for it!" "But I ____ back in early spring!" "So and so did ______ to me." "I just need to find a job." "Don't you want me to be happy?!" I've heard it all at this point. I don't want to hear anymore, I just don't have it in me.
Here's the weird part, with the two aforementioned SF's, I was not really directly involved with the severing, one out of cowardness and the other just sort of happened, with no ill words passing directly between us. An indirect severance, if you will. This time it is different. This time there has been damage done directly to me.
The scoop - without getting too messy, I know this person has wittingly and/or unwittingly talked MAD sh*t about Dane and I and how we supposedly pressured, coerced, manipulated, and oppressed this person. I know this person then vehomently denied having ever said those things when called to the carpet. I know that this person has wrecked the same havoc on a few of my very close friends after leaving my (and Dane's) life an absolute mess. I know this person thinks they are doing the right thing. I know this person has absolutely no idea what they have done.
You can't trash a person, use them for all they are willing to give you, borrow extensive amounts of time, money, resources, etc. from them without some sort of recourse. At some point there needs to be a reconciliation or comeuppance! After the better part of the year with little to no effort made and then at that only when begged, I vote this person off the island. Comeuppance for you!
So it is with that that I will knowingly and willingly severe another friendship. I wish this person the best, we've had some GREAT times together that I will always look back on fondly. But call this person a life long friend, I do not.
*sigh* I hate doing this. But I also hate how toxic people can be. I can't believe after all we've shared, and all I've done for this person that it would come to this. I can just see it now - "I was going to _____!" "I told ____ that I did ____ and that made up for it!" "But I ____ back in early spring!" "So and so did ______ to me." "I just need to find a job." "Don't you want me to be happy?!" I've heard it all at this point. I don't want to hear anymore, I just don't have it in me.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Weekend PI
I can tell that I'm getting stressed because my head "herpes" (as I call my dry, flakey scalp) is back. But it's a good stressed. And it's more excitement than stress. Dane and I are preparing for the Fremont Summer Solstice Parade this weekend. My costume is done, with the exception of a few pieces. It was actually quite amusing, last Wednesday LR and I had a date to make the flower hair clips for my costume but we also wanted to go to the Rebar and see the "semi-pro" (I use that term VERY loosely) wrestlers. Seattle and its wonders never cease to amaze me. We got to watch wrestling (picture men in their 20's - the heaviest wrestler was a buck fifty in pajamas, as it was the Pajama Rama Jam), drink PBR for $1 and then we actually got to throw the empty cans at the wrestlers. Good times. LR and I sat in the back making my flower clips. First time I'd ever made arts and crafts while at a bar.
Dane's costume is a little trickier. He has a lot of gold lame in the Anubis costume that needs to be phased out. Plus we needed to find him a red shirt and pants. You would not believe how hard it is to find a plain, blood red shirt and pants of similar red coloring. I finally did find something for a top at Target but we were at a loss for his pants. And then, I remembered something profound! I had red pajama bottoms! They look like capris on Dane, but his knees down are covered with the other problem, a bunch of gold lame. So to solve that problem, I drew up a pattern of flames and we purchased a tulle/meshy type material and started making his costume. Nick and Andrew came over to help as well.
Saturday I went to school. I don't like my new teacher. Then we slaved away on Dane's costume some more. It's too cool for words. We had to do a lot of stuff ghetto (glueing fabric to fabric instead of sewing, and burning the edges of the fabric so it wont fray) but it looks good. For fun we went to RB's mom's house (parents are away) and even took the minivan to dinner w/ HG, her hubby and RB's hubby. It was fun to pretend we were renegade teenagers again. We stayed up late playing card games and watching movies - always a blast with that crowd.
Sunday we shopped at Ikea for our reading room and other stuff. Then I met with my team then went home and shaped Dane's mask using an X-acto blade, my hands are all cut up. Then I painted it - looks good.
As for this week, things are booked solid. Steven is coming in town on Friday, which is a godsend - he can help us get ready, secure a spot on the parade route, and then we can decorate my reading room go to Alki, and then meet up w/ HG and M for dinner and dance at Kolbeh. I really hope it doesn't rain for the parade, I've spent too much time and money on these costumes to get rained out.
After this busy busy weekend it will be a relatively slow week spent focusing on school and catching up at work. HG's b-day celebration and the Children's Charity Ride are coming up. Before I know it, it will be June! What the toot!
Dane's costume is a little trickier. He has a lot of gold lame in the Anubis costume that needs to be phased out. Plus we needed to find him a red shirt and pants. You would not believe how hard it is to find a plain, blood red shirt and pants of similar red coloring. I finally did find something for a top at Target but we were at a loss for his pants. And then, I remembered something profound! I had red pajama bottoms! They look like capris on Dane, but his knees down are covered with the other problem, a bunch of gold lame. So to solve that problem, I drew up a pattern of flames and we purchased a tulle/meshy type material and started making his costume. Nick and Andrew came over to help as well.
Saturday I went to school. I don't like my new teacher. Then we slaved away on Dane's costume some more. It's too cool for words. We had to do a lot of stuff ghetto (glueing fabric to fabric instead of sewing, and burning the edges of the fabric so it wont fray) but it looks good. For fun we went to RB's mom's house (parents are away) and even took the minivan to dinner w/ HG, her hubby and RB's hubby. It was fun to pretend we were renegade teenagers again. We stayed up late playing card games and watching movies - always a blast with that crowd.
Sunday we shopped at Ikea for our reading room and other stuff. Then I met with my team then went home and shaped Dane's mask using an X-acto blade, my hands are all cut up. Then I painted it - looks good.
As for this week, things are booked solid. Steven is coming in town on Friday, which is a godsend - he can help us get ready, secure a spot on the parade route, and then we can decorate my reading room go to Alki, and then meet up w/ HG and M for dinner and dance at Kolbeh. I really hope it doesn't rain for the parade, I've spent too much time and money on these costumes to get rained out.
After this busy busy weekend it will be a relatively slow week spent focusing on school and catching up at work. HG's b-day celebration and the Children's Charity Ride are coming up. Before I know it, it will be June! What the toot!
Friday, June 09, 2006
Severed Friendships
And now a moment to reflect on my severed friendships of the past. I noticed that there is a lot of grief surrounding the memories we share and there is a lot of blame, namely placed on me. I don't understand this, I really wish I did. It's taken me a long time to realize that some people just need a scapegoat and/or they need to hate you in order to move on. This I realized a while ago. What I wasn't prepared for is how long the hate has lasted. It's been well over a year since the mad drama went down in Colorado with a few people. I've made posts on this before, so in an effort not to repeat myself too much I will simply say that I definitely could have handled my conduct better, that's for sure! As for the others, I can't really speak for them or cast judgement on them. I don't understand what they were going through any more than they understand my own situation. What I can say:
To Becky (oh sh*t - I used REAL names!) - I'm so, so glad that you took that first, brave step to contact me. I know I didn't handle things well at all and I'm a very lucky person to have your forgiveness and understanding. It was so nice seeing you again. And I'm so proud of you! Look at everything you've accomplished!! You will continue to grow and shine, I just know it. I'm happy we are back to communicating, even if only in brief. And congratulations, you know what for. I'm sorry for last summer, truly, I am. And I'm sorry if I ever caused you pain and grief in your other relationships and friendships, I certainly never meant that to happen.
To Paula - I am also very sorry for how things turned out for us as well. Again, I did not handle myself well regardless of my intentions. I think I somehow got mixed up in what I thought was "protecting" Rhi (how silly can I be?!) and matters that I had no business being in. I'm really sorry for that. I guess I didn't realize at the time what I was doing. I hate that I've caused you (and others) so much pain. We might not have seen eye to eye on every subject under the sun, but I sure did enjoy your company while it was around. You too will always be a bright spot in someone's (in fact many people's) lives.
Recap - I think sometimes people just don't mix well together. Like ketchup, peanutbutter, and jelly. All three components are fabulous and have a variety of uses and they all have distinct, bold flavors. But if you combined them, it becomes a big blurry, disgusting mess. I don't know if that's because personalities, like flavors, can sometimes bring out the best and worst in other personalities, or if it's some other profound reason. What I do know is that I think I'm an okay person. And I think Becky and Paula are great people. And try as I might, I just don't think we are great people together. That doesn't mean that I don't respect and admire them though, I do. And I wish them the best. I know they deserve it.
Cheers, mates. To the great times we had.
To Becky (oh sh*t - I used REAL names!) - I'm so, so glad that you took that first, brave step to contact me. I know I didn't handle things well at all and I'm a very lucky person to have your forgiveness and understanding. It was so nice seeing you again. And I'm so proud of you! Look at everything you've accomplished!! You will continue to grow and shine, I just know it. I'm happy we are back to communicating, even if only in brief. And congratulations, you know what for. I'm sorry for last summer, truly, I am. And I'm sorry if I ever caused you pain and grief in your other relationships and friendships, I certainly never meant that to happen.
To Paula - I am also very sorry for how things turned out for us as well. Again, I did not handle myself well regardless of my intentions. I think I somehow got mixed up in what I thought was "protecting" Rhi (how silly can I be?!) and matters that I had no business being in. I'm really sorry for that. I guess I didn't realize at the time what I was doing. I hate that I've caused you (and others) so much pain. We might not have seen eye to eye on every subject under the sun, but I sure did enjoy your company while it was around. You too will always be a bright spot in someone's (in fact many people's) lives.
Recap - I think sometimes people just don't mix well together. Like ketchup, peanutbutter, and jelly. All three components are fabulous and have a variety of uses and they all have distinct, bold flavors. But if you combined them, it becomes a big blurry, disgusting mess. I don't know if that's because personalities, like flavors, can sometimes bring out the best and worst in other personalities, or if it's some other profound reason. What I do know is that I think I'm an okay person. And I think Becky and Paula are great people. And try as I might, I just don't think we are great people together. That doesn't mean that I don't respect and admire them though, I do. And I wish them the best. I know they deserve it.
Cheers, mates. To the great times we had.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
I'm Back
I am back from a LONG trip cover over 8 states of the western half of the US. *PHEW* There is WAY, WAY, WAY too much that happened for me to write it all down, especially for fear that I might miss something or leave someone/thing out, so instead I will just comment a one liner for each day I was gone, it is merely the first thing that comes to my head, nothing more or less. I cherished the time I had in Denver with my beloved friends. There was something so nice and comfortable and absolutely unexplainable about coming "home". It was wonderful to be with my family again, that I've missed so dearly. And it was nice to see Moab, though I fear for last time for a long time anyway.
Wed, May 17th - Amy - how I miss our nights at Boston's. It seemed like it had been just a long week since I'd seen you last but so much has happened since. Thank you for a wonderful evening and the opportunity to meet another wonderful, new friend - Lauren.
Thur, May 18th - A wonderful day at the zoo w/ my sister and Mel and their beautiful children, my niece and nephew, and god-daughter. I can't imagine a better afternoon. The day was only topped by a wonderful gathering of my closest and dearest friends (save Amy) at D&B - the fellowship was amazing, albeit poorly planned on my behalf. I shall do better next time.
Fri, May 19th - Body Worlds is amazing! It was great to see my old colleagues, how much has changed yet stayed the same. Joe is fabu and I adore spending time with him.
Sat, May 20th - Sarah, my dear, dear Sarah. I will never, ever forget this day. A perfect day of joy riding in the car, shopping in the Pearl Street mall, lunchtime martinis and gossip, and water, walks, and sunshine. And then the Skylark - GREAT bar! I had a blast. It was nice to be Sam's A team for once too, I like him. Of course, the only way to end that day/night was with the EXTREMELY AWESOME news that Sarah gave me. I don't know if I'm at liberty to speak of it, so I wont, but it was wonderful news that I'm extremely excited about.
Sun, May 21st - I got my China Taipei. AND Heidi's - a double bonus. Drove to Grand Junction in a truck. Fun fun.
Mon, May 22nd - drove to Vegas at warp speed, to my dad's dismay. Vegas = buffets galore, 25 cent slots, rollar coasters, beakers of beer, and shopping cart rides on the strip. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
Tue, May 23rd - drove to CA at a snails pace, to my dad's dismay again. Then I got sick and spent the next few days in bed.
Wed, May 24th - In bed. Good dinner w/ my folks though. AND HOLY HELL THEY HAVE A NICE HOUSE!
Thur, May 25th - My luggage got lost. My travel stories never end. Fortunately I was prepared and had a Moab bag w/ Dane.
Fri, May 26th - Dane "rolled" the Jeep in a bathtub, then I drove down the canyon - "IT'S JUST STEEP IT'S JUST STEEP IT'S JUST STEEP"
Sat, May 27th - In bed.
Sun, May 28th - In bed. Went to the Da Vinci Code.
Mon, May 29th - On the road.
Tue, May 30th - On the road. Home at 8:00.
And then I got back to work to employee appreciation day, then cleaned my office, then Monday was a staff retreat. So it was a nice ease back into work.
Office Damage Report - so my "clues" were styrofoam peanuts on my name tag in the parking garage, my in/out magnet, and my mail box was stuffed w/ packing peanuts. My office door was shut and the window foiled so I couldn't see in. I opened the door expecting 10,000 peanuts to overtake me but instead there where tons of streamers hanging from the ceiling and anything they could tie to twine and hang from the ceiling, they did! My ten-key, my flower vase, stapler, cd player, candle, pillow, coffee mug, ALL the contents of my in box (strug up using twine and binder clips - think of photo processing), and then, as if that wasn't enough, they twined my desk chair to the desk so you couldn't pull it out, they tied twine around the arms of my emergency sweater so you couldn't get your arms in. Then to top it all off, they filled all my desk drawers with packing peanuts!! They filled my fax box and my printer box w/ peanuts too. AND they MAILED me an envelope full of packing peanuts!! They filled my journal boxes with peanuts....my gym bag....the blanket on my chair....the lamp shades....It was good times! It took me all Friday morning to clean everything up!
That's all for now.
Wed, May 17th - Amy - how I miss our nights at Boston's. It seemed like it had been just a long week since I'd seen you last but so much has happened since. Thank you for a wonderful evening and the opportunity to meet another wonderful, new friend - Lauren.
Thur, May 18th - A wonderful day at the zoo w/ my sister and Mel and their beautiful children, my niece and nephew, and god-daughter. I can't imagine a better afternoon. The day was only topped by a wonderful gathering of my closest and dearest friends (save Amy) at D&B - the fellowship was amazing, albeit poorly planned on my behalf. I shall do better next time.
Fri, May 19th - Body Worlds is amazing! It was great to see my old colleagues, how much has changed yet stayed the same. Joe is fabu and I adore spending time with him.
Sat, May 20th - Sarah, my dear, dear Sarah. I will never, ever forget this day. A perfect day of joy riding in the car, shopping in the Pearl Street mall, lunchtime martinis and gossip, and water, walks, and sunshine. And then the Skylark - GREAT bar! I had a blast. It was nice to be Sam's A team for once too, I like him. Of course, the only way to end that day/night was with the EXTREMELY AWESOME news that Sarah gave me. I don't know if I'm at liberty to speak of it, so I wont, but it was wonderful news that I'm extremely excited about.
Sun, May 21st - I got my China Taipei. AND Heidi's - a double bonus. Drove to Grand Junction in a truck. Fun fun.
Mon, May 22nd - drove to Vegas at warp speed, to my dad's dismay. Vegas = buffets galore, 25 cent slots, rollar coasters, beakers of beer, and shopping cart rides on the strip. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
Tue, May 23rd - drove to CA at a snails pace, to my dad's dismay again. Then I got sick and spent the next few days in bed.
Wed, May 24th - In bed. Good dinner w/ my folks though. AND HOLY HELL THEY HAVE A NICE HOUSE!
Thur, May 25th - My luggage got lost. My travel stories never end. Fortunately I was prepared and had a Moab bag w/ Dane.
Fri, May 26th - Dane "rolled" the Jeep in a bathtub, then I drove down the canyon - "IT'S JUST STEEP IT'S JUST STEEP IT'S JUST STEEP"
Sat, May 27th - In bed.
Sun, May 28th - In bed. Went to the Da Vinci Code.
Mon, May 29th - On the road.
Tue, May 30th - On the road. Home at 8:00.
And then I got back to work to employee appreciation day, then cleaned my office, then Monday was a staff retreat. So it was a nice ease back into work.
Office Damage Report - so my "clues" were styrofoam peanuts on my name tag in the parking garage, my in/out magnet, and my mail box was stuffed w/ packing peanuts. My office door was shut and the window foiled so I couldn't see in. I opened the door expecting 10,000 peanuts to overtake me but instead there where tons of streamers hanging from the ceiling and anything they could tie to twine and hang from the ceiling, they did! My ten-key, my flower vase, stapler, cd player, candle, pillow, coffee mug, ALL the contents of my in box (strug up using twine and binder clips - think of photo processing), and then, as if that wasn't enough, they twined my desk chair to the desk so you couldn't pull it out, they tied twine around the arms of my emergency sweater so you couldn't get your arms in. Then to top it all off, they filled all my desk drawers with packing peanuts!! They filled my fax box and my printer box w/ peanuts too. AND they MAILED me an envelope full of packing peanuts!! They filled my journal boxes with peanuts....my gym bag....the blanket on my chair....the lamp shades....It was good times! It took me all Friday morning to clean everything up!
That's all for now.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
And I'm Off!
Tomorrow I leave for Colorado:
I'm interested to see what has changed and what has stayed the same.
I'm excited to see my friends and family.
I'm nervous about the long drive ahead.
I'm excited to spend a night in Vegas with Rhi.
I'm already irritated at house stressful things will be.
I'm excited to go to Moab.
I'm nervous about the Jeep and how it will drive.
I want/don't want to drive the Jeep.
I'm looking forward to Boulder with Sarah.
I'm thankful Amy is picking me up and I'll get one on one time with her.
I wonder who will go to Dave & Busters.
I'm anxious to see Marcia and happy to go to the museum with her.
I look forward to seeing my niece and nephew and going to the zoo.
I'm not looking forward to how much money I will be spending.
I can't WAIT to eat at: House of Kabob, Black Eyed Pea, Le Peep, China Taipei, and Mongolian BBQ.
I wish I had lost more weight.
I'm thankful I have NO school for the whole time.
I'm going to miss Dane.
I'm going to miss my kitties!
I'm happy to see my dad.
I wonder what I'll think of Colorado after having been gone for a while.
I hope the weather is nice.
I'm interested to see what has changed and what has stayed the same.
I'm excited to see my friends and family.
I'm nervous about the long drive ahead.
I'm excited to spend a night in Vegas with Rhi.
I'm already irritated at house stressful things will be.
I'm excited to go to Moab.
I'm nervous about the Jeep and how it will drive.
I want/don't want to drive the Jeep.
I'm looking forward to Boulder with Sarah.
I'm thankful Amy is picking me up and I'll get one on one time with her.
I wonder who will go to Dave & Busters.
I'm anxious to see Marcia and happy to go to the museum with her.
I look forward to seeing my niece and nephew and going to the zoo.
I'm not looking forward to how much money I will be spending.
I can't WAIT to eat at: House of Kabob, Black Eyed Pea, Le Peep, China Taipei, and Mongolian BBQ.
I wish I had lost more weight.
I'm thankful I have NO school for the whole time.
I'm going to miss Dane.
I'm going to miss my kitties!
I'm happy to see my dad.
I wonder what I'll think of Colorado after having been gone for a while.
I hope the weather is nice.
Monday, May 01, 2006
The Swinging World of Swingers
Wow. I had the most enlightening weekend. Just 3 days ago I would have preached about how horrible and immoral just the thought of "swinging" was. But now that I've tried it, I cannot believe how amazing it is and how many doors it has "swung" wide open for Dane and I. We've been hanging out with some friends of mine that shall remain nameless, let's just call them BR and JT. They are married and very open about their "activities". Dane and I have always been like "yeah -whatever" and ignored that part of them as we enjoyed their company. Well, we went to dinner on Saturday night at the local Mexican restaurant (after desicrating Heather's office with over 350 balloons filled with confetti) and had a few too many margaritas. Next thing I know we are headed back to our house for some fun in the hot tub. Since BR and JT didn't have their suits, we decided - what the hey, let's just skinny dip. And we all know what hot tubs + nudity + alcohol = gratuitous sex! At first I was a little squeemish, but then as I realized how much fun Dane was having with JT, I loosened up and decided to go for it too. It was so hot watching Dane and JT and being watched by JT and Dane. And then JT started to wink at me and before I knew it, JT and I were ALL over each other!! Wow-what a night!! I know I should feel dirty and remorseful, but all I can think about is: when can we do it again!!
Not. This is a humorous reminder that above all my blog is a diary of events, a planner for the future, and a way for people to see what's new in my life at their leisure. It is not the end all be all to ALL my thoughts. It does not contain EVERY detail of my life NOR does it map out my plans in excess for the future. To a large degree I leave a lot of information out for personal reasons. That's not to say that I don't share funny, embarrassing, or sexy stories. It is to say that some stuff is personal. Do not cast judgement on me because you do or don't see something in here that you think should be. You want a blog, get your own at www.blogger.com.
What really happened this weekend: Friday night I drank a couple glasses of wine on an empty belly and then got up the courage to tell Dane that I was upset that he didn't call me to let me know he was coming home late. I left out the "other woman" part....till later. Dane really did do an amazing job of making me feel like I was the world to him. He bought me flowers and a card and listened to me and made googly eyes at me - we had a lot of fun on Friday. We went to Taco Bell for dinner and then drove go karts w/ Nick and Jacob and Mog for Nick's b-day. After that I went home to go to bed while the boys went to a strip club for Nick. Nick got a double lap dance for his b-day courtesy of Dane and Crystal. Dane got a lap dance just because courtesy of Jebis (my alter-ego). He was not thrilled. Saturday I started my Income Tax class, should be better than the last. Then went to lunch w/ Dane and then to Seattle to cover Heather's office in balloons (yes we really did that). Afterwards we went to dinner w/ my boss Rebecca and Tom (who were in on the balloon fray). We drank diet coke and water. :-) Then Dane and I went home and watched the South Park Rewind w/ Nick and Jacob. I went to bed at 11. Sunday we spent the day getting fresh produce and seafood at Pike Place Market. Then I went to my team meeting, then we went to see Ice Age 2, then went home and relaxed.
Now I just need to focus on closing March (a quarter end as well) and getting everything together before I leave for CO. I can't wait!!!
Not. This is a humorous reminder that above all my blog is a diary of events, a planner for the future, and a way for people to see what's new in my life at their leisure. It is not the end all be all to ALL my thoughts. It does not contain EVERY detail of my life NOR does it map out my plans in excess for the future. To a large degree I leave a lot of information out for personal reasons. That's not to say that I don't share funny, embarrassing, or sexy stories. It is to say that some stuff is personal. Do not cast judgement on me because you do or don't see something in here that you think should be. You want a blog, get your own at www.blogger.com.
What really happened this weekend: Friday night I drank a couple glasses of wine on an empty belly and then got up the courage to tell Dane that I was upset that he didn't call me to let me know he was coming home late. I left out the "other woman" part....till later. Dane really did do an amazing job of making me feel like I was the world to him. He bought me flowers and a card and listened to me and made googly eyes at me - we had a lot of fun on Friday. We went to Taco Bell for dinner and then drove go karts w/ Nick and Jacob and Mog for Nick's b-day. After that I went home to go to bed while the boys went to a strip club for Nick. Nick got a double lap dance for his b-day courtesy of Dane and Crystal. Dane got a lap dance just because courtesy of Jebis (my alter-ego). He was not thrilled. Saturday I started my Income Tax class, should be better than the last. Then went to lunch w/ Dane and then to Seattle to cover Heather's office in balloons (yes we really did that). Afterwards we went to dinner w/ my boss Rebecca and Tom (who were in on the balloon fray). We drank diet coke and water. :-) Then Dane and I went home and watched the South Park Rewind w/ Nick and Jacob. I went to bed at 11. Sunday we spent the day getting fresh produce and seafood at Pike Place Market. Then I went to my team meeting, then we went to see Ice Age 2, then went home and relaxed.
Now I just need to focus on closing March (a quarter end as well) and getting everything together before I leave for CO. I can't wait!!!
Friday, April 28, 2006
What's Happening to Me?
So I got to looking through my blog. Not sure how it started, I was just taking a slight break and then next thing I know, 20 minutes is gone reviewing the last year of my life. I look at my posts from a year ago and I laugh! I miss that Crystal! What have I become?! What have I lost in order to get here? How can I get it back?! I"m not playful anymore. I'm not happy. I don't have spunk. I'm all business and it's boring.
Dane spent the better part of last night with another woman. I don't even pretend to know why. I don't even want to spend time with me, why would he? It's like - I try so hard to lose weight and be beautiful and be career minded and everything he wants me to be, but I find that I feel stiffled. I want to be pretty again. I want to be noticed. I don't know if I like this new, quiet Crystal. I spent the last six months convincing myself that I need to become this calm, quiet, mums-the-word person and now I resent it! WHAT HAPPENED TO ME!!!
What happened to the Crystal that spoke her mind? What happened to the Crystal that didn't get pushed around? What happened to the Crystal that was strong no matter what? The way I am now, you'd think a stiff breeze would blow me over and that's simply NOT my character. I used to talk. I used to smile and coerce others to smile too. I used to fit in.
So I'm going on on this blog about poor me and this and that and then I just had a great talk at work w/ Kimberly. We laughed, exchanged ideas and notes, and bonded. :-)
And then Amy sends me this:
"Dude I never thought about how much it must suck to be an earthworm... They come out of the ground when it is all moist and glistening and enticing... and then the rain stops. And the sun comes out. And the rain dries up. And they get all crispy before they can worm their way back home.
Do you think they have conscious thoughts (like "Oh sh*t!") and feelings of pain while they're frying?"
How can I be upset about my life after that?! D@mn Amy and her ruining my Seattle Angst!
Dane spent the better part of last night with another woman. I don't even pretend to know why. I don't even want to spend time with me, why would he? It's like - I try so hard to lose weight and be beautiful and be career minded and everything he wants me to be, but I find that I feel stiffled. I want to be pretty again. I want to be noticed. I don't know if I like this new, quiet Crystal. I spent the last six months convincing myself that I need to become this calm, quiet, mums-the-word person and now I resent it! WHAT HAPPENED TO ME!!!
What happened to the Crystal that spoke her mind? What happened to the Crystal that didn't get pushed around? What happened to the Crystal that was strong no matter what? The way I am now, you'd think a stiff breeze would blow me over and that's simply NOT my character. I used to talk. I used to smile and coerce others to smile too. I used to fit in.
So I'm going on on this blog about poor me and this and that and then I just had a great talk at work w/ Kimberly. We laughed, exchanged ideas and notes, and bonded. :-)
And then Amy sends me this:
"Dude I never thought about how much it must suck to be an earthworm... They come out of the ground when it is all moist and glistening and enticing... and then the rain stops. And the sun comes out. And the rain dries up. And they get all crispy before they can worm their way back home.
Do you think they have conscious thoughts (like "Oh sh*t!") and feelings of pain while they're frying?"
How can I be upset about my life after that?! D@mn Amy and her ruining my Seattle Angst!
Monday, April 24, 2006
Colorado in May!
What the toot?! It's been almost two weeks since my last post! Many pardons, or "my bad". Anyway - looks like I'll be in Colorado for May to help my folks move. I will be flying in on Wed and leaving on Sunday and I thought 5 days was plenty of time to catch up. WRONG!! As it were, it worked out well for me to take my two week consecutive vaca time and combine CO with my annual Moab trip. So here goes, the crazy a$$ schedule:
Wed, May 17th: Amy picks me up at 6:30 and we go out for dinner and drinks and one on one time. Maybe I can even get to see Kailea. If nothing else, it will be AWESOME to rekindle the old late night dinner and drinks spirit Amy and I once partook in once a week for many years.
Thurs, May 18th: Amy drops me off at mom's and I spend the day with my sister and niece and nephew. Early dinner at 5:00 at House of Kabob (I can't live without eating their hummus) and then off to Dave & Buster's for fun and games with anyone and everyone who can make it out there. Spend the night w/ Rhi, where I'll get some one on one time with her.
Friday, May 19th: Orignally I was going to spend this with Amy, but as it turns out I will be going to lunch w/ the C&C crew, then to the Body Worlds exhibit at the museum of Nature and Science. From there Joe, Sohie and I will probably go to a Rockies game and then out on the town.
Saturday, May 20th: Lunch with Max and Sarah at Le Peep, hopefully - we'll see if I can convince them to go there (I can't wait to see how big Max has gotten). Then Sarah and I will go to Boulder for the day - can't wait! I need some one on one time with her desperately. After that we will go to dinner at Mongolian BBQ then hit some lazy bar around town. I get to stay at Sarah's NEW house and see the place, can't wait!
Sunday, May 21st: Brunch at China Taipei (this is a must - I NEED their combo fried rice). Then off to load my truck with the fabu assistance of Miss Rhi. Sometime on Sunday my parents, my aunt, my dad's friend, and I will set a course for Western Colorado, maybe stay in Glenwood or something.
Monday, May 22nd: Drive.
Tuesday, May 23rd: Drive.
Wednesday, May 24th: Drive and unload in Carmel, CA.
Thursday, May 25th: Catch an early flight out of San Jose to Salt Lake City to rendez-vous w/ Dane, who will have been driving all night from Bellevue to get to SLC. We'll dine w/ his mom and then continue down to Moab, arriving in the late evening. Not wanting to worry about lugging the camping gear, losing time setting up the camping gear, and just generally wanting to relax, we opted for a hotel this year at Moab - thank GAWD!
Friday, May 26th: Four wheeling
Saturday, May 27th: Four wheeling
Sunday, May 28th: Four wheeling
Monday, May 29th: Non-four wheeling related group activity - water rafting, hiking, rock climbing, maybe sky diving - that would be fun...Leave for WA by 3:00 in the afternoon, drive all day and night with a short pit stop in SLC again.
Tuesday, May 30th: Drive, home in time to attend my Fremont Summer Solstice dance class.
Wednesday, May 31st: Sleep in and REST!! Do laundry, homework and basically catch up from the business of the last two weeks.
I'm lucky in that May 21st - 27th I have off of school entirely meaning I do not have to make any discussion posts online OR turn in any homework. I will have to make a daily post on the 17th - 20th though, but that shouldn't be too hard. Especially since I'll have my laptop. Then it's a "quiet week" May 28th - June 3rd, meaning I only have homework due, no discussion posts. How lucky is that?! Whoo!
So here's to wishing me a safe drive and all that jazz!
Wed, May 17th: Amy picks me up at 6:30 and we go out for dinner and drinks and one on one time. Maybe I can even get to see Kailea. If nothing else, it will be AWESOME to rekindle the old late night dinner and drinks spirit Amy and I once partook in once a week for many years.
Thurs, May 18th: Amy drops me off at mom's and I spend the day with my sister and niece and nephew. Early dinner at 5:00 at House of Kabob (I can't live without eating their hummus) and then off to Dave & Buster's for fun and games with anyone and everyone who can make it out there. Spend the night w/ Rhi, where I'll get some one on one time with her.
Friday, May 19th: Orignally I was going to spend this with Amy, but as it turns out I will be going to lunch w/ the C&C crew, then to the Body Worlds exhibit at the museum of Nature and Science. From there Joe, Sohie and I will probably go to a Rockies game and then out on the town.
Saturday, May 20th: Lunch with Max and Sarah at Le Peep, hopefully - we'll see if I can convince them to go there (I can't wait to see how big Max has gotten). Then Sarah and I will go to Boulder for the day - can't wait! I need some one on one time with her desperately. After that we will go to dinner at Mongolian BBQ then hit some lazy bar around town. I get to stay at Sarah's NEW house and see the place, can't wait!
Sunday, May 21st: Brunch at China Taipei (this is a must - I NEED their combo fried rice). Then off to load my truck with the fabu assistance of Miss Rhi. Sometime on Sunday my parents, my aunt, my dad's friend, and I will set a course for Western Colorado, maybe stay in Glenwood or something.
Monday, May 22nd: Drive.
Tuesday, May 23rd: Drive.
Wednesday, May 24th: Drive and unload in Carmel, CA.
Thursday, May 25th: Catch an early flight out of San Jose to Salt Lake City to rendez-vous w/ Dane, who will have been driving all night from Bellevue to get to SLC. We'll dine w/ his mom and then continue down to Moab, arriving in the late evening. Not wanting to worry about lugging the camping gear, losing time setting up the camping gear, and just generally wanting to relax, we opted for a hotel this year at Moab - thank GAWD!
Friday, May 26th: Four wheeling
Saturday, May 27th: Four wheeling
Sunday, May 28th: Four wheeling
Monday, May 29th: Non-four wheeling related group activity - water rafting, hiking, rock climbing, maybe sky diving - that would be fun...Leave for WA by 3:00 in the afternoon, drive all day and night with a short pit stop in SLC again.
Tuesday, May 30th: Drive, home in time to attend my Fremont Summer Solstice dance class.
Wednesday, May 31st: Sleep in and REST!! Do laundry, homework and basically catch up from the business of the last two weeks.
I'm lucky in that May 21st - 27th I have off of school entirely meaning I do not have to make any discussion posts online OR turn in any homework. I will have to make a daily post on the 17th - 20th though, but that shouldn't be too hard. Especially since I'll have my laptop. Then it's a "quiet week" May 28th - June 3rd, meaning I only have homework due, no discussion posts. How lucky is that?! Whoo!
So here's to wishing me a safe drive and all that jazz!
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
The Pain of the Past
Who knew it would cost so much and hurt so bad to remove the mistakes of my past?! O-U-C-H!!!! I went in for my first of 6 - 10 laser tattoo removal sessions. I have begun Phase 1 of my total body renovation. For some reason turning 26 lit a fire under my ass that will not be soon put out. I am no where near where I thought I would be and/or wanted to be at 26, so plans are moving forward at ludicrous speed. All the excuses that I made up before are null. Time is of the essense and it will take a good 2 - 4 years to complete everything that I intend to do by the time 30 slaps me in the face. The following is my personal list of goals made public, for all to hold me accountable for. Voila!
Goals for 30th birthday
Education
Completed Bachelor's degree - in process/to be completed 10/06
Completed Master's degree - possible completion Spring '08, otherwise Spring '09
Enrolled in study program for CPA exam - No later than Summer '08 or '09
Information gathered on law degree or PHD - School/program/timeframe selected by Winter '09
Career
Earning at the very least $55,000/year ($43K inflation, $2K BA, $5K MA) - speaks for itself
Revolving CFA and/or more corps under my belt, or mini-controller - ditto
Community
Continue fostering animals for Humane Society - this is already in place since Dec '05
Become a mentor for children - I have a training session in May to attend
Obtain info on child fostering/adopting - I have a lot of info on this already, but by 30 I will get serious about it
Body
Tattoos removed - in process/to be completed by December '06
Junk hair removed - I'm still iffy on this, but if I go for it, done by Summer '07
Teeth whitened - consultation appointment made/to be completed by Summer '06
Augmentation - I'm still iffy on this too, I will only consider it if goal weight is met and maintained and even then it's iffy. If I do this, it will be done between my bachelors and masters programs, so completed by Summer '07
Stable 130 - 140 lbs - this is ongoing with not much progress *sigh*
Non-dyed, healthy hair - so far so good, I just have to not be tempted to dye it again
Eyebrows touched up - this will happen on a trip to Colorado, probably sometime in Summer '07
Mind
Continued yoga practice - in process/morning routine
Painting - in process/watercolor lessons
Dancing - in process/drama of dance, followed by Summer Solstice training, then PowerBelly
Frivalties
Tanning bed - I want this by Dec '06
Hot tub - purchased 3/25/06. :-)
Massage membership - I still need to look into this
Maid - in place since Jan '06 - love them!!!
Convertible sports car - hmmmm, this one depends on Mr. Man's raise/money, not mine :-)
New motorcycle - to be purchased after Moab, an 06 GSXR 1000 for Mr. Man
Travel - so far only moving my parents and Moab is scheduled for the year outside of small WA state trips. I think we will go somewhere around the holidays, but I don't know where or for how long.
Kauai - maybe we will go here?
Greece - this is for the honeymoon and/or masters graduation
Vancouver - maybe we will do this for my two weeker in August
So I have a few goals and about 3.5 years to do it. I think all the above thoughts and goals are 100% attainable. They are realistic, within reason, and within my control to accomplish. And I've got a good start on a good portion of the list.
In the meantime, I think tequilla shots are necessary for my next laser visit!
Goals for 30th birthday
Education
Completed Bachelor's degree - in process/to be completed 10/06
Completed Master's degree - possible completion Spring '08, otherwise Spring '09
Enrolled in study program for CPA exam - No later than Summer '08 or '09
Information gathered on law degree or PHD - School/program/timeframe selected by Winter '09
Career
Earning at the very least $55,000/year ($43K inflation, $2K BA, $5K MA) - speaks for itself
Revolving CFA and/or more corps under my belt, or mini-controller - ditto
Community
Continue fostering animals for Humane Society - this is already in place since Dec '05
Become a mentor for children - I have a training session in May to attend
Obtain info on child fostering/adopting - I have a lot of info on this already, but by 30 I will get serious about it
Body
Tattoos removed - in process/to be completed by December '06
Junk hair removed - I'm still iffy on this, but if I go for it, done by Summer '07
Teeth whitened - consultation appointment made/to be completed by Summer '06
Augmentation - I'm still iffy on this too, I will only consider it if goal weight is met and maintained and even then it's iffy. If I do this, it will be done between my bachelors and masters programs, so completed by Summer '07
Stable 130 - 140 lbs - this is ongoing with not much progress *sigh*
Non-dyed, healthy hair - so far so good, I just have to not be tempted to dye it again
Eyebrows touched up - this will happen on a trip to Colorado, probably sometime in Summer '07
Mind
Continued yoga practice - in process/morning routine
Painting - in process/watercolor lessons
Dancing - in process/drama of dance, followed by Summer Solstice training, then PowerBelly
Frivalties
Tanning bed - I want this by Dec '06
Hot tub - purchased 3/25/06. :-)
Massage membership - I still need to look into this
Maid - in place since Jan '06 - love them!!!
Convertible sports car - hmmmm, this one depends on Mr. Man's raise/money, not mine :-)
New motorcycle - to be purchased after Moab, an 06 GSXR 1000 for Mr. Man
Travel - so far only moving my parents and Moab is scheduled for the year outside of small WA state trips. I think we will go somewhere around the holidays, but I don't know where or for how long.
Kauai - maybe we will go here?
Greece - this is for the honeymoon and/or masters graduation
Vancouver - maybe we will do this for my two weeker in August
So I have a few goals and about 3.5 years to do it. I think all the above thoughts and goals are 100% attainable. They are realistic, within reason, and within my control to accomplish. And I've got a good start on a good portion of the list.
In the meantime, I think tequilla shots are necessary for my next laser visit!
Monday, April 10, 2006
Monday, March 27, 2006
Spoiled
I'm spoiled. Dane and I purchased a hot tub this weekend. First of all, our back patio is P-E-R-F-E-C-T for it, it's nothing but a concrete pad. Second, I pulled my credit (in the excellent range *BEAM*) BUT it was suggested that I establish more credit and hang on to the cards that I have. I can't believe I didn't even think about this, but when I paid off all my credit cards I got when I was 18 (Capital One, Household Bank, Mervyns, Express, etc) and closed the accounts, I actually did some damage. Creditors look for longetivity (I should have known this) and for all intents and purposes I have only had credit since '03 when I opened all my current credit cards. Let me tell you how stoopid I feel. D'oh. Oh well, time will fix that mistake. Anyway, after learning that I need to establish more credit, Dane and I sat down and thought about all the things we want and what we can finance. A hot tub came up and next thing you know we bought one and it's being installed on Thursday. We sat in the SUPER EXTREMELY EXTRAVAGANT OUTRAGEOUS ALL THE BELLS AND WHISTLES AND EVEN CLEANS YOUR HOUSE tub first. It was awesome. Sound system, foot massagers all the way around, rotating and pulsating back massagers, chrome fittings and knobs, mother of pearl futuristic shell, automatic cover lifter, water fountain with back lit lights so the water coming out of the fountain looks colored, this tub was awesome. It was also almost $11,000. Thank gawd our neighbor slash lifeguard was with us otherwise I might have drown after hearing the price tag. Once rescued I suggested a different, perhaps "no frills" tub. The sales guy laughed and said he totally understood. He directed us to a different brand but still a subsidary of the uber tub brand. The tub was just as nice, same materials, same quality, same makers, nothing shiny or fancy - just a completely functional hot tub. This tub was WAY cheaper and definitely in our price range. The sales guy likened it to the difference between the Mercedes S class and C class. The C class still has all the reputation of a Mercedes and a bit of luxury without the luxury price. For those who want a Mercedes w/o paying $60,000, they get a C class. Sure they want to be in an S class, but a C class Mercedes is still a Mercedes. Of course we want the uber tub, but a hot tub of the same make is still a hot tub. And of course let's not mention how ridiculous it would be if we got a nice ass hot tub for a house we don't even own. It'd be like putting nice rims on a Metro. No matter how nice the rims are, it just looks silly.
I celebrated my second weekend of no take home work. I still had a lot of homework and I still brought home some work in case I was tempted but I'm getting pretty tired of working on the weekends. I realize it's my fault I'm behind, but I need a break before I quit and become a barista. Dane and I had friends over on Friday and then I went to the Bellydance Superstars show w/ Laura Rose on Saturday. My first complete girls night out (save PDX w/ Jojo) since I've been here. It was very low key and much needed. We talked about our lives, Colorado, credit, body modification, and bellydance all over happy hour sushi.
We came home early today to meet the electrician (for the hot tub) and our cleaners were still here. I'm sad because it will be their last time here. The woman (Mercedes) is ill and can no longer be around the chemicals used to clean houses (this is the best explanation we could come up with between our lack of a common language). I like Mercedes and Jose a lot and I will miss having their touch to my house. I guess we will get new cleaners, but I will still miss them. I hope she gets well soon. I worry for her and her husband. But they seem to be doing well.
School is going better this week. I dropped a load of cash on some interactive tutorials and study books to help me adjust to this new learning environment. It should help.
I haven't worked out since Wed of last week. I'm so bad. I will go tomorrow for my prescribed hour and ten minutes. I discovered that 1.5 hours was just too much, but just over an hour a couple times a week and just under an hour a few times a week is just right. Of course I packed on the pounds that I lost courtesy of daquiris, pizza, and lobster. I'm so bad. Oh well, I'll just have to work that much harder.
Look at me. I'm totally chastising myself for taking a weekend to relax, purchasing something that I'd like to have and is relaxing, eating good food and not exercising to the point of exhaustion. And here I thought I had calmed down. I haven't calmed down a bit, I've just exiled everything else out of my life (friends, nail care, hair care, etc) so I could become a nazi about work, school, and my body. What happened to my mind and spirit. I even have an art room and tools for relaxation. I have a yoga mat and humidifier for moving meditation. WTF. Back to the drawing board for me I guess. I need to come up with a good plan and stick to it. A reasonable plan. Just cause there are 7 days a week does not mean I have to work out each one. Just because I goof up one day on my diet doesn't mean I should throw in the towel. Just because school is a little tougher, I don't have to spend hours on it every d*mn day. Just because I'm behind at work doesn't mean I can't enjoy my time off from it!
New plan = workout 3 - 5 times a week. Weekend calories can be up to 2000. At least 5 hours a week dedicated to painting, dancing, yoga, whatever. No work on the weekends unless absolutely necessary. No more than 5 hours of homework on the weekends unless absolutely necessary. Let's see how well I stick to this plan.
I celebrated my second weekend of no take home work. I still had a lot of homework and I still brought home some work in case I was tempted but I'm getting pretty tired of working on the weekends. I realize it's my fault I'm behind, but I need a break before I quit and become a barista. Dane and I had friends over on Friday and then I went to the Bellydance Superstars show w/ Laura Rose on Saturday. My first complete girls night out (save PDX w/ Jojo) since I've been here. It was very low key and much needed. We talked about our lives, Colorado, credit, body modification, and bellydance all over happy hour sushi.
We came home early today to meet the electrician (for the hot tub) and our cleaners were still here. I'm sad because it will be their last time here. The woman (Mercedes) is ill and can no longer be around the chemicals used to clean houses (this is the best explanation we could come up with between our lack of a common language). I like Mercedes and Jose a lot and I will miss having their touch to my house. I guess we will get new cleaners, but I will still miss them. I hope she gets well soon. I worry for her and her husband. But they seem to be doing well.
School is going better this week. I dropped a load of cash on some interactive tutorials and study books to help me adjust to this new learning environment. It should help.
I haven't worked out since Wed of last week. I'm so bad. I will go tomorrow for my prescribed hour and ten minutes. I discovered that 1.5 hours was just too much, but just over an hour a couple times a week and just under an hour a few times a week is just right. Of course I packed on the pounds that I lost courtesy of daquiris, pizza, and lobster. I'm so bad. Oh well, I'll just have to work that much harder.
Look at me. I'm totally chastising myself for taking a weekend to relax, purchasing something that I'd like to have and is relaxing, eating good food and not exercising to the point of exhaustion. And here I thought I had calmed down. I haven't calmed down a bit, I've just exiled everything else out of my life (friends, nail care, hair care, etc) so I could become a nazi about work, school, and my body. What happened to my mind and spirit. I even have an art room and tools for relaxation. I have a yoga mat and humidifier for moving meditation. WTF. Back to the drawing board for me I guess. I need to come up with a good plan and stick to it. A reasonable plan. Just cause there are 7 days a week does not mean I have to work out each one. Just because I goof up one day on my diet doesn't mean I should throw in the towel. Just because school is a little tougher, I don't have to spend hours on it every d*mn day. Just because I'm behind at work doesn't mean I can't enjoy my time off from it!
New plan = workout 3 - 5 times a week. Weekend calories can be up to 2000. At least 5 hours a week dedicated to painting, dancing, yoga, whatever. No work on the weekends unless absolutely necessary. No more than 5 hours of homework on the weekends unless absolutely necessary. Let's see how well I stick to this plan.
Monday, March 20, 2006
A Break!
Well, I didn't plan it this way, but I took this weekend off from work. It would have been too much otherwise. I haven't had a weekend off in over two weeks now and I was getting seriously burnt out. I will have to work harder this week, but that's no big deal.
Friday Dane spent the entire day at a local Irish pub. He was tanked by the time I picked him up at 6 wearing his green shirt and painted clover on his forehead. It's not often (if ever) a completely sober Crystal has seen a completely smashed Dane. It was amusing to say the least. We went home, had a few friends over for games. I went to bed early, Dane passed out early, and our friends stayed over till after 2 am playing and having fun. It was just like old times at the Lameria house.
Saturday morning started early for me with my Advanced Accounting class. Taking the classes on flex-net will definitely be an adjustment from on-campus, but I think I will like it. I will like my team too. They only had two members so they were very happy to have me come aboard. After class I went home and completely some chores. Then Dane and Nick came home and we decided to go see V for Vendetta - good movie. On the way home I got slightly irritated w/ the crew I was with and decided to hit the liquor store and then walk home to get fresh air. It was good for me and I'm glad I got the chance to exercise. We ended up playing games and watching TV till 5 am (I can't believe we stayed up that late - time flies when you are having fun)!
Sunday was just warm enough for a motorcycle ride downtown. After that Dane and I napped for a bit (we are getting so old). Then we watched Discovery Channel till about 11 and called it a day.
So not much too exciting, but I definitely needed a break. I feel rejuvenated and ready to kick ass on my closings. Almost done w/ January.
I felt really sad on Saturday. It would have been really nice to have a friend to call up and go share a drink with, but alas - I don't really know anyone on that level here. I almost called Heather but in the end decided to just hang out at home. Growing older is sad. I'm having a lot of revelations about growing up, people were right. I will probably write more about this thought thread when I have collected my ideas, but for now I'm sorta lost in weird dimension. Perhaps its better that I am going through this on my own, I stand to learn a lot about myself in the process.
Friday Dane spent the entire day at a local Irish pub. He was tanked by the time I picked him up at 6 wearing his green shirt and painted clover on his forehead. It's not often (if ever) a completely sober Crystal has seen a completely smashed Dane. It was amusing to say the least. We went home, had a few friends over for games. I went to bed early, Dane passed out early, and our friends stayed over till after 2 am playing and having fun. It was just like old times at the Lameria house.
Saturday morning started early for me with my Advanced Accounting class. Taking the classes on flex-net will definitely be an adjustment from on-campus, but I think I will like it. I will like my team too. They only had two members so they were very happy to have me come aboard. After class I went home and completely some chores. Then Dane and Nick came home and we decided to go see V for Vendetta - good movie. On the way home I got slightly irritated w/ the crew I was with and decided to hit the liquor store and then walk home to get fresh air. It was good for me and I'm glad I got the chance to exercise. We ended up playing games and watching TV till 5 am (I can't believe we stayed up that late - time flies when you are having fun)!
Sunday was just warm enough for a motorcycle ride downtown. After that Dane and I napped for a bit (we are getting so old). Then we watched Discovery Channel till about 11 and called it a day.
So not much too exciting, but I definitely needed a break. I feel rejuvenated and ready to kick ass on my closings. Almost done w/ January.
I felt really sad on Saturday. It would have been really nice to have a friend to call up and go share a drink with, but alas - I don't really know anyone on that level here. I almost called Heather but in the end decided to just hang out at home. Growing older is sad. I'm having a lot of revelations about growing up, people were right. I will probably write more about this thought thread when I have collected my ideas, but for now I'm sorta lost in weird dimension. Perhaps its better that I am going through this on my own, I stand to learn a lot about myself in the process.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Humility
I think the biggest and best lesson I've learned since living here is humility. Even just 6 months ago I thought I knew everything there was to know. You couldn't tell me otherwise. When I first started this job and RB said it will take a good year to learn everything, I laughed to myself and scoffed "those fools - I'll have this stuff down by December!" I was wrong. I am still floundering. But I am also learning. Then I used to think that if I wasn't doing it, it wasn't getting done right OR I was the only one who should carry my burden. I was wrong. Admitting defeat and then asking for help was the hardest thing I've done so far here. And I'm not talking "I don't know how to do this" help, I'm talking "I know exactly how to do this and I have no excuse for why it hasn't been done yet but it needs to be done now" help. It was not easy for me to ask HG to close one of my corps for me, but I'm glad I did. Not only did it teach me a lesson, and lighten the load, the corps ended up needing it sooner than I would have otherwise been able to provide it. Close call saved by asking for help. Maybe I will do that more often.
In other news, the process is slow going, but I am steadily losing weight and firming up. I've lost about 5 lbs in the last month. Nothing crazy, but I can also tell that it's not coming back. I've made a lot of lifestyle changes recently in order to become healthy and lose weight and I have a feeling that if I continue what I'm doing, I will drop the weight in about 6 months or so. Not as fast as I want, but a steady drop is fantastic.
I started my first round of homework last night for accounting. I forgot how much I love accounting. The hussle and bussle of the Army has taken from the general joy I get from doing accounting (for now - it will get better) and doing a few simple problems restored that joy and also my confidence in my abilities. Look out Master's degree - here I come, ready or not!
Dane is busy with his Jeep. Good for him. Moab will be just around the corner - he needs all the prep time he can get his hands on.
I start a new belly dance class with Laura Rose tomorrow - it should be fun to spend more time w/ her. Then in May we will begin preparing for the Fremont Parade. Delilah is planning on taking over the parade and has scheduled a Seattle belly dance retreat called the Billion Belly March. I'm excited to work with LR on this project. I also hope some of my CO friends can make it up to see the parade, it will be a remarkable event.
That's it for now. My Dewey is the sweetest cat in the world. He sleeps next to my pillow each night and lets me put my arms around him and cuddle. And when I'm tired of laying on that side, I turn to the other and cuddle Stinker. I LOVE MY CATS!!!
In other news, the process is slow going, but I am steadily losing weight and firming up. I've lost about 5 lbs in the last month. Nothing crazy, but I can also tell that it's not coming back. I've made a lot of lifestyle changes recently in order to become healthy and lose weight and I have a feeling that if I continue what I'm doing, I will drop the weight in about 6 months or so. Not as fast as I want, but a steady drop is fantastic.
I started my first round of homework last night for accounting. I forgot how much I love accounting. The hussle and bussle of the Army has taken from the general joy I get from doing accounting (for now - it will get better) and doing a few simple problems restored that joy and also my confidence in my abilities. Look out Master's degree - here I come, ready or not!
Dane is busy with his Jeep. Good for him. Moab will be just around the corner - he needs all the prep time he can get his hands on.
I start a new belly dance class with Laura Rose tomorrow - it should be fun to spend more time w/ her. Then in May we will begin preparing for the Fremont Parade. Delilah is planning on taking over the parade and has scheduled a Seattle belly dance retreat called the Billion Belly March. I'm excited to work with LR on this project. I also hope some of my CO friends can make it up to see the parade, it will be a remarkable event.
That's it for now. My Dewey is the sweetest cat in the world. He sleeps next to my pillow each night and lets me put my arms around him and cuddle. And when I'm tired of laying on that side, I turn to the other and cuddle Stinker. I LOVE MY CATS!!!
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
No Way Out
*sigh* I hate and love my job so much I'm completely confused. I'm so stressed but as calm as I've ever been. I'm completely happy and utterly depressed with my life. What the eff, yo? :-)
Seriously though, we had a group CFA meeting this morning and got our asses handed to us. Between the FPP accts, the kettle season, and just the normal delays of the holidays, and then the backdraft of it all, all us CFA's are tardy on our financial reports and our boss got her ass handed to her from her boss, and we all know that sh*t rolls down yahtty yahtty yah...And I'm so behind it hurts. I am working every weekend and some weekday nights in March in order to catch up to "zero". This is so stressful, I can't even begin to explain. And I know all of it is brought on myself cause I have to be some perfectionist superhero or something. Geesh CJE - STOP YOUR STUPID SELF!!! So that's the part I hate. The part I love is how well I get along w/ my boss and the other CFA's. We are such a great team - everyone pulls for the other and there is so much support, it's amazing. And the bottom line - (and this is so great) no matter how upset the bosses get about stuff being tardy, they still love us and appreciate us to the hilt. We are CONSTANTLY encouraged and assured that we are in no "permenant" danger. I love that. In past jobs I've always feared being fired. Not here. Love that!
So I've managed to cut the "fat" from my life to the point that I have more free time than I've ever known what to do with. By cut the fat I mean that I've whiddled my schedule down to work, working out, homework, and freetime only. No more nails, very few tanning sessions, no friends to meet with (in town anyway), no away-from-home yoga or belly dancing (that's all done at the house now). Nothing but time. Of course the majority of it is now allocated to homework and work work, but I need that time right now. The rest of the time is split between much needed relaxation, painting, yoga, reading, and playing with kitties. So while I'm stressed over work and school, that's all I'm stressed about.
As for happiness - I really do love it here. I don't plan on leaving for a while. I laugh because everyone always talks about Seattle and the rain. So there is rain, but not what I psyched myself out for so it's been a pleasant surprise. And then everyone said I would miss the Rocky Mountains. Which I do and they are beautiful but if I look to the West, I can see the Olympic Range. If I look to the East, I can see the Cascades. If I look South, Mr. Mt. Rainer is all up in my business (most days - he's a slacker in the winter). If I look North, Mt. Baker sometimes says hello (she's shy). So I have everything here that I had in CO, but what I have here that I am learning I love so much is WATER!! How did I live 25 years of my life and not be around water? It's so beautiful!! And just the feel of this place - I feel at home here.
As for depression - I'm tired of talking about it or going into it. Let's just say it's old. It's disgusting. It's an absolute mockery of me and of us. It's fake, it's phony. And I hate myself for backing myself into a place that I can't get out of. I'm counting on a few key individuals right now to pull through for me, and once they do - well, we will leave that for the jury. *I realize this last part is about as vague as can be. But I know what it's about. For anyone else, insert any Supreme Court case you would like. Think of it as an amusing mad lib. After all, what more can anyone do but laugh?
Seriously though, we had a group CFA meeting this morning and got our asses handed to us. Between the FPP accts, the kettle season, and just the normal delays of the holidays, and then the backdraft of it all, all us CFA's are tardy on our financial reports and our boss got her ass handed to her from her boss, and we all know that sh*t rolls down yahtty yahtty yah...And I'm so behind it hurts. I am working every weekend and some weekday nights in March in order to catch up to "zero". This is so stressful, I can't even begin to explain. And I know all of it is brought on myself cause I have to be some perfectionist superhero or something. Geesh CJE - STOP YOUR STUPID SELF!!! So that's the part I hate. The part I love is how well I get along w/ my boss and the other CFA's. We are such a great team - everyone pulls for the other and there is so much support, it's amazing. And the bottom line - (and this is so great) no matter how upset the bosses get about stuff being tardy, they still love us and appreciate us to the hilt. We are CONSTANTLY encouraged and assured that we are in no "permenant" danger. I love that. In past jobs I've always feared being fired. Not here. Love that!
So I've managed to cut the "fat" from my life to the point that I have more free time than I've ever known what to do with. By cut the fat I mean that I've whiddled my schedule down to work, working out, homework, and freetime only. No more nails, very few tanning sessions, no friends to meet with (in town anyway), no away-from-home yoga or belly dancing (that's all done at the house now). Nothing but time. Of course the majority of it is now allocated to homework and work work, but I need that time right now. The rest of the time is split between much needed relaxation, painting, yoga, reading, and playing with kitties. So while I'm stressed over work and school, that's all I'm stressed about.
As for happiness - I really do love it here. I don't plan on leaving for a while. I laugh because everyone always talks about Seattle and the rain. So there is rain, but not what I psyched myself out for so it's been a pleasant surprise. And then everyone said I would miss the Rocky Mountains. Which I do and they are beautiful but if I look to the West, I can see the Olympic Range. If I look to the East, I can see the Cascades. If I look South, Mr. Mt. Rainer is all up in my business (most days - he's a slacker in the winter). If I look North, Mt. Baker sometimes says hello (she's shy). So I have everything here that I had in CO, but what I have here that I am learning I love so much is WATER!! How did I live 25 years of my life and not be around water? It's so beautiful!! And just the feel of this place - I feel at home here.
As for depression - I'm tired of talking about it or going into it. Let's just say it's old. It's disgusting. It's an absolute mockery of me and of us. It's fake, it's phony. And I hate myself for backing myself into a place that I can't get out of. I'm counting on a few key individuals right now to pull through for me, and once they do - well, we will leave that for the jury. *I realize this last part is about as vague as can be. But I know what it's about. For anyone else, insert any Supreme Court case you would like. Think of it as an amusing mad lib. After all, what more can anyone do but laugh?
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Seattle Times
Well not much to report. So I'm just going to go off on a tangent and let my fingers type whatever they want.
Dane got a Jeep on Sunday. It's not a looker but it will be able to out trail our Montero. We saw pics of it doing trails that we could only hear stories about in the past years. Dane has some work to do before we can get it to Moab, mostly odds and ends stuff. The Montero will be parted out and/or sold for a small price. It's saddening, but also very exciting for the new Jeep. Dane is scared to drive it. It's a monster. He's so happy. He spent Monday night in the garage tightening bolts (that's about all he knows how to do at this point) and dreaming up all the different things he can do to it. Good for him, I'm so glad he is happy.
We are also talking about getting him a new motorcycle too. He is deciding between a Hayabosa, a new GSXR1000, or a ZX-10. I will inherit his old GSXR1000 - yeah me!! He's looking up parts for the old gixxer so he can give it to me in nice, clean shape. Awe, how sweet. I can't complain about that!
We have our whole summer layed out as far as game/movie nights (to coincide w/ my school Saturdays), motorcycle trips, and bike Sundays. August has been deemed "get to know your surrounding volcanoes" month. Dane and I will trek to each volcano on the bikes - Baker, Rainer, St. Helens, and Hood. Should be good times.
We have another foster kitty named Precious - who tugs at my heartstrings. Dane and I have to force feed her at nights and it breaks our hearts! She's so sniffly and wheezy - but she's such a trooper, she purrs through it all and then she gets her treat of us brushing her to her heart's content. Poor little dear. :-(
That's about all for now. School is going okay at best. Work is going well, but busy. March is stay at home month. Dane and I dubbed it that so we could focus on special household projects, rest after 4 months of non-stop action, save money for Moab, test out a theory I have on alcohol and dieting, and so I can catch up on work. It's March and I still haven't closed all my corps for December or January - BAD CRYSTAL!!
Dane got a Jeep on Sunday. It's not a looker but it will be able to out trail our Montero. We saw pics of it doing trails that we could only hear stories about in the past years. Dane has some work to do before we can get it to Moab, mostly odds and ends stuff. The Montero will be parted out and/or sold for a small price. It's saddening, but also very exciting for the new Jeep. Dane is scared to drive it. It's a monster. He's so happy. He spent Monday night in the garage tightening bolts (that's about all he knows how to do at this point) and dreaming up all the different things he can do to it. Good for him, I'm so glad he is happy.
We are also talking about getting him a new motorcycle too. He is deciding between a Hayabosa, a new GSXR1000, or a ZX-10. I will inherit his old GSXR1000 - yeah me!! He's looking up parts for the old gixxer so he can give it to me in nice, clean shape. Awe, how sweet. I can't complain about that!
We have our whole summer layed out as far as game/movie nights (to coincide w/ my school Saturdays), motorcycle trips, and bike Sundays. August has been deemed "get to know your surrounding volcanoes" month. Dane and I will trek to each volcano on the bikes - Baker, Rainer, St. Helens, and Hood. Should be good times.
We have another foster kitty named Precious - who tugs at my heartstrings. Dane and I have to force feed her at nights and it breaks our hearts! She's so sniffly and wheezy - but she's such a trooper, she purrs through it all and then she gets her treat of us brushing her to her heart's content. Poor little dear. :-(
That's about all for now. School is going okay at best. Work is going well, but busy. March is stay at home month. Dane and I dubbed it that so we could focus on special household projects, rest after 4 months of non-stop action, save money for Moab, test out a theory I have on alcohol and dieting, and so I can catch up on work. It's March and I still haven't closed all my corps for December or January - BAD CRYSTAL!!
Thursday, February 23, 2006
I suppose
It's time for another entry. Though I have nothing to report. Absolutely nothing. But I can make a semi-interesting list of facts:
1. The weekend in PDX went well, I had a great time with Dane. We did a little partying on Saturday and our fav Greek place - Dane got drunk! Not often that that happens. All in all it was a fun little getaway.
2. Work is going well, I am getting better and faster at closing even though it has still taken me a while to get through the muck of kettle season.
3. I am continuing to work out according to Rhi's Routine. My boss has even joined the gym and goes with me 2 - 3 times a week. And I've started doing yoga again, though I do it at home in my yoga/art room.
4. I have started on a watercolor painting lesson, good stuff.
5. I heard back from my doctor, who wants me to come in again for more testing.
6. I am becoming more and more anti-social. The more time I take to myself, the more cautious I am about who I spend my time with when I'm not with myself. I guess now that I've slowed down, I really appreciate the down low nature of everything and I've found that I don't welcome or want the previous drama that seemed to exist in my life in CO. Here in WA things are slow, at my pace. I love that.
7. Rhi is in town for a few hours this weekend. We should have a wonderful time watching Delilah and Laura Rose belly dance, then afterwards we will go out w/ LR for a while - I haven't seen her in a while either. Rhi will have just enough time for dinner, some chat, and to pack her car as full as she can before she's off to Denver and Dane and I are off to Tacoma for a game night.
8. I love that I have a fun relationship with my boss and colleages.
9. No new news from Mom & Dad.
10. Dewey is adorable.
That is all. Riviting, I know.
1. The weekend in PDX went well, I had a great time with Dane. We did a little partying on Saturday and our fav Greek place - Dane got drunk! Not often that that happens. All in all it was a fun little getaway.
2. Work is going well, I am getting better and faster at closing even though it has still taken me a while to get through the muck of kettle season.
3. I am continuing to work out according to Rhi's Routine. My boss has even joined the gym and goes with me 2 - 3 times a week. And I've started doing yoga again, though I do it at home in my yoga/art room.
4. I have started on a watercolor painting lesson, good stuff.
5. I heard back from my doctor, who wants me to come in again for more testing.
6. I am becoming more and more anti-social. The more time I take to myself, the more cautious I am about who I spend my time with when I'm not with myself. I guess now that I've slowed down, I really appreciate the down low nature of everything and I've found that I don't welcome or want the previous drama that seemed to exist in my life in CO. Here in WA things are slow, at my pace. I love that.
7. Rhi is in town for a few hours this weekend. We should have a wonderful time watching Delilah and Laura Rose belly dance, then afterwards we will go out w/ LR for a while - I haven't seen her in a while either. Rhi will have just enough time for dinner, some chat, and to pack her car as full as she can before she's off to Denver and Dane and I are off to Tacoma for a game night.
8. I love that I have a fun relationship with my boss and colleages.
9. No new news from Mom & Dad.
10. Dewey is adorable.
That is all. Riviting, I know.
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