This will be my last blog entry from the fine state of Colorado. As I sit here listening to Yanni, looking out my BEAUTIFUL office window at the GORGEOUS Colorado mountains I am filled with too many emotions to be overwhelmed by one single feeling. I feel sadness, awe, happiness, stress, excitement, fear, nostalgia, pride, humility, a sense of awesome accomplishment dimmed by the thousands of things that I just never got around to doing in Denver. I fear what I don't know that I can even do in Seattle.
I find that with leaving Denver, I am very restless. I do not think we will stay in Seattle more than 5 years tops. Who knows where we will move to, but I have a couple cities on my list that I want to live in: San Francisco, Atlanta, Manhattan, *maybe* Chicago, *maybe* a Texan city, London, Cairo - the list goes on. But I have a feeling that I am on a fast track now. It has me reconsidering things like getting another bike and all this scnazzy furniture. Who knows where my life will take me, but overall the feeling I feel the most right now is that this first step is not only the first step on my own, in a different direction, but I feel it is my first step into a headlong sprint. And I love that.
So cheerio Denver! I have wonderful and not so wonderful memories of this place. All of which I am taking with me. Alas, it is time to shed this old, dry skin.
Friday, August 26, 2005
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Looking Back
Dane asked me yesterday what would I say to myself if given the opportunity to travel back in time to April having experienced the whole summer and the stress of moving primary locations. At first thought, and what I told Dane, is that I wouldn't have said much of anything other than "you were prepared for this". But as I got to thinking about things, I thought better of my short-sighted advice to myself and decided there would be a lot of things I would say to myself (shock of shocks, I know). What I would say to my April Self:
Intermediate Accounting - you psyched yourself out too much for this class, but it was a good thing. Your fears helped you study and find a study pattern that worked best for you. You have spent a good year preparing for these classes and you handled them well. It was good that Dane was gone during this time. It was good that you decided to take the classes in Colorado. You made the right decision staying here.
Acting out - you need to be prepared for weird emotions that you have never felt before and ones that kinda sneak up on you and show themselves in seemingly harmless, or fun, or pretty packages. While you were expecting "missing" Dane, you were not prepared for the impact of the decision you made in regards to the level of commitment with this man. Be prepared for confused, angry emotions surrounding the level of commitment and sacrifice on your end vs. the lack of ring or formal commitment on his end. Be prepared for harmful situations that seem fun at the time but might not be the best thing for you in the short and long term. Try not to treat this summer as a prolonged bachelorette party....
Moving - it is a lot of work to pack and move a house, even when you plan it the way you did. Things never work out the way they do on paper, you know this, but it is still good to have a plan. It is also good to leave a lot of extra time to get things done that might have been pushed to the side (again, you know this but I'd like to reiterate it). You will be tired in body and mind and unable to get a good night's rest during the last week, but this is normal. You will be tired of fast food. The kitties will act out. You will resent Dane for not being there. This is all normal and life WILL stabilize. It will NOT be like this forever, dear. Hang in there.
Work - you will suffer from short-timer's syndrome whether you admit to it or not. Your anger at how the company is managed and the way the nonprofit money is spent and how the employees are not rewarded will compound and you will run your mouth. I'm not going to say this is good or bad, I'm simply going to tell you that you will do it. You may wish to keep your mouth shut at times, others you may wish to shout from the roof top. Regardless, when you leave, your attitude towards the company will be known by most employees.
Dane - you still haven't learned how to handle love have you? Will you ever, I wonder? It seems that ever since Isis died you have shut people out - oh, don't get me wrong. You let people in, care for people, let them know you love them, but you haven't ever really let anyone "get" you. Perhaps this is fallout from Mike, though I know you never loved him. Maybe it is from letting yourself fall in love too quickly with the man that killed Isis. That is probably it, you are worried that once you let someone get to you like that, they will turn around and do something so autrocious you will never be able to forgive yourself for what you consider selfishness. So why would Dane be any different? He's not. In fact he's been the only candidate for your love since Isis died. You would think that after 3 full years you would budge. I wonder why you find it so necessary to constantly threaten him with a break up. Is that your own insecurities? Is it that you think you settle for Dane? I would suggest you spend these next couple months thinking about that. Think about what you want Dane to be vs. what you know he is. Think about what you desire more. Think about his efforts to change. Think about your need to improve. Rather than building a Plan B, think about polishing up your Plan A. It IS your first choice, after all. Perhaps you should consider letting Dane all the way in and if you lose him, then you can deal with that when that day comes rather than living every day with him as if it has already been ended. He is not your enemy, he is your number one resource and reason for not going off the deep end. You better recognize, Crystal.
Parents - for as much as you give your mom or your family shit for being "obligated" to attend family functions, you are sure going to miss them. And it won't be obvious till you realize how much you still depend on them to bail you out certain situations. You will miss your mom's stories and fits. You will miss your dad's advice and his gentle demeanor. You will miss your sister and her whole family. You will miss Ashley and Zach growing up. You will probably never be prepared for cutting the family ties.
Conclusion - you have so much ahead of you Crystal, but you are sometimes entirely too stubborn and cocky to realize it. You are so busy getting to the destination, you forget to process and learn from the journey. There were so many lessons you could have learned without the hardships this summer. There were so many times you could have gained from just slowing down. I hope in Seattle you will learn the value of relaxing and spending quality down time with the ones you love. You don't always have to be accomplishing something in order to feel accomplished. Good luck to you, deary, I fear you will need it for a long time coming.
Intermediate Accounting - you psyched yourself out too much for this class, but it was a good thing. Your fears helped you study and find a study pattern that worked best for you. You have spent a good year preparing for these classes and you handled them well. It was good that Dane was gone during this time. It was good that you decided to take the classes in Colorado. You made the right decision staying here.
Acting out - you need to be prepared for weird emotions that you have never felt before and ones that kinda sneak up on you and show themselves in seemingly harmless, or fun, or pretty packages. While you were expecting "missing" Dane, you were not prepared for the impact of the decision you made in regards to the level of commitment with this man. Be prepared for confused, angry emotions surrounding the level of commitment and sacrifice on your end vs. the lack of ring or formal commitment on his end. Be prepared for harmful situations that seem fun at the time but might not be the best thing for you in the short and long term. Try not to treat this summer as a prolonged bachelorette party....
Moving - it is a lot of work to pack and move a house, even when you plan it the way you did. Things never work out the way they do on paper, you know this, but it is still good to have a plan. It is also good to leave a lot of extra time to get things done that might have been pushed to the side (again, you know this but I'd like to reiterate it). You will be tired in body and mind and unable to get a good night's rest during the last week, but this is normal. You will be tired of fast food. The kitties will act out. You will resent Dane for not being there. This is all normal and life WILL stabilize. It will NOT be like this forever, dear. Hang in there.
Work - you will suffer from short-timer's syndrome whether you admit to it or not. Your anger at how the company is managed and the way the nonprofit money is spent and how the employees are not rewarded will compound and you will run your mouth. I'm not going to say this is good or bad, I'm simply going to tell you that you will do it. You may wish to keep your mouth shut at times, others you may wish to shout from the roof top. Regardless, when you leave, your attitude towards the company will be known by most employees.
Dane - you still haven't learned how to handle love have you? Will you ever, I wonder? It seems that ever since Isis died you have shut people out - oh, don't get me wrong. You let people in, care for people, let them know you love them, but you haven't ever really let anyone "get" you. Perhaps this is fallout from Mike, though I know you never loved him. Maybe it is from letting yourself fall in love too quickly with the man that killed Isis. That is probably it, you are worried that once you let someone get to you like that, they will turn around and do something so autrocious you will never be able to forgive yourself for what you consider selfishness. So why would Dane be any different? He's not. In fact he's been the only candidate for your love since Isis died. You would think that after 3 full years you would budge. I wonder why you find it so necessary to constantly threaten him with a break up. Is that your own insecurities? Is it that you think you settle for Dane? I would suggest you spend these next couple months thinking about that. Think about what you want Dane to be vs. what you know he is. Think about what you desire more. Think about his efforts to change. Think about your need to improve. Rather than building a Plan B, think about polishing up your Plan A. It IS your first choice, after all. Perhaps you should consider letting Dane all the way in and if you lose him, then you can deal with that when that day comes rather than living every day with him as if it has already been ended. He is not your enemy, he is your number one resource and reason for not going off the deep end. You better recognize, Crystal.
Parents - for as much as you give your mom or your family shit for being "obligated" to attend family functions, you are sure going to miss them. And it won't be obvious till you realize how much you still depend on them to bail you out certain situations. You will miss your mom's stories and fits. You will miss your dad's advice and his gentle demeanor. You will miss your sister and her whole family. You will miss Ashley and Zach growing up. You will probably never be prepared for cutting the family ties.
Conclusion - you have so much ahead of you Crystal, but you are sometimes entirely too stubborn and cocky to realize it. You are so busy getting to the destination, you forget to process and learn from the journey. There were so many lessons you could have learned without the hardships this summer. There were so many times you could have gained from just slowing down. I hope in Seattle you will learn the value of relaxing and spending quality down time with the ones you love. You don't always have to be accomplishing something in order to feel accomplished. Good luck to you, deary, I fear you will need it for a long time coming.
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
As We Speak
I am on the 2nd interview with Salvation Army as we speak. Well, not yet - I am waiting for them to call....And then I will write more. I am trying so hard not to be nervous and just let it go - I think I am so nervous because I think I really want this job even though it is a significant pay cut and all the way downtown. But to have SA on my resume, and the job just sounds so challenging and wonderful. Okay, okay. Worse case scenario I don't get it. I've had numerous calls from temp agencies the last two days, so I will call them if I don't get hired on at SA, and who knows - maybe the Hopelink job is still available. A cursory check of Craigslist and their own website indicates that the job is still there. And that job pays more and is in Redmond. When I originally sent my resume out, the CFO emailed me back and asked what my timeframe was, I responded and have not heard back from her since, even after I emailed a second time. If I don't get the SA job, I will email her a third time and say that I noticed the job was still available, would she still be interested in a phone interview. For now, I am going to sit and look out my beautiful office window at the amazing Colorado scenery and take it all in and calm down. *deep breath* More in a moment....
UGH!!!! I take that back - the worst case scenario would be waiting for ANOTHER two weeks!!!! I have an in-person interview on 9/2 at 9:00. I said "Would it be too bold to ask where I rank among the candidates?" LONG PAUSE "Well, we are still in the interview process, but I'd say you rank quite highly." Me "Great, thank you so much for your time, I look forward to meeting you on September 2nd at 9:00 am." Them "Great, nice speaking with you too, Crystal, see you soon!"
ARGH!!! Well I am going to continue calling these other places that called me and set interviews up as well, but I will hold off on calling Hopelink till I actually arrive in Seattle. It is, afterall, still another 3.5 weeks before I can start work.
UGH!!!! I take that back - the worst case scenario would be waiting for ANOTHER two weeks!!!! I have an in-person interview on 9/2 at 9:00. I said "Would it be too bold to ask where I rank among the candidates?" LONG PAUSE "Well, we are still in the interview process, but I'd say you rank quite highly." Me "Great, thank you so much for your time, I look forward to meeting you on September 2nd at 9:00 am." Them "Great, nice speaking with you too, Crystal, see you soon!"
ARGH!!! Well I am going to continue calling these other places that called me and set interviews up as well, but I will hold off on calling Hopelink till I actually arrive in Seattle. It is, afterall, still another 3.5 weeks before I can start work.
Monday, August 15, 2005
Greater Things Than I
So there are greater forces at work here. Even more so than I thought possible. I've always been a firm believer that things happen for a reason, regardless of whether that reason is known or not. I will not get in to all the crazy details of the past week, but suffice it to say that the Universe was already preparing for decisions not yet made. There were bodies and events in motion long before we knew what the end result would be. To capitalize on a few events:
1) Randy offered on Tuesday to take my car on Friday to Seattle via the trailer that we are purchasing from him - took care of my car, our need for a trailer, and freed up the moving van from towing.
2) On Tuesday we were offered a house which would work wonders for our living situation with any guests. As it turned out, we opted out of that house in favor of a bigger house with a bigger lot for lots and lots of parking room.
There are other things going on as well, but all good things. I am confident that Rhi needs to get away from Denver in order to dispose of all her excess baggage and move on with Kate. I have no doubt Kate will be a good friend for her regardless of what happens in their relationship, but she realizes and encourages Rhi to make this move in order to mop her life up. I'm glad Rhi's going - for selfish reasons and because I know that it is the right thing for her.
I've never denied being selfish - no one can ever accuse me of that. I'd like to meet one person who is truly selfless - maybe Ghandi, Mother Theresa? I also want what is best for those around me and I truly believe that Dane and I can help Rhi the way she needs it. We've agreed to be harder on her (I know some would say that I am too hard on her - but what do they know about my relationship with Rhi behind closed doors, probably about the same amount as I know about their countless relationships) when it comes to finances and money so she can really get a grasp on her checkbook. Besides, we won't know anyone in Seattle, so the invitation to go out weekly won't be there.
So in all these rambles - I guess I just have to say that I am glad with how things are going. And I truly miss Dane. It's funny cause this whole summer I've been like "WHHHOOOO!!!!!" And now that I finally start to REALLY REALLY miss Dane, it's time to leave. So I'm like "Eh, I'll see him in two weeks. WWWHHHHOOOOOOO!!!" HAAH! Just kidding. I missed him a lot this weekend.
*raises cup* To Seattle AND BEYOOONNNDDD!!!!
1) Randy offered on Tuesday to take my car on Friday to Seattle via the trailer that we are purchasing from him - took care of my car, our need for a trailer, and freed up the moving van from towing.
2) On Tuesday we were offered a house which would work wonders for our living situation with any guests. As it turned out, we opted out of that house in favor of a bigger house with a bigger lot for lots and lots of parking room.
There are other things going on as well, but all good things. I am confident that Rhi needs to get away from Denver in order to dispose of all her excess baggage and move on with Kate. I have no doubt Kate will be a good friend for her regardless of what happens in their relationship, but she realizes and encourages Rhi to make this move in order to mop her life up. I'm glad Rhi's going - for selfish reasons and because I know that it is the right thing for her.
I've never denied being selfish - no one can ever accuse me of that. I'd like to meet one person who is truly selfless - maybe Ghandi, Mother Theresa? I also want what is best for those around me and I truly believe that Dane and I can help Rhi the way she needs it. We've agreed to be harder on her (I know some would say that I am too hard on her - but what do they know about my relationship with Rhi behind closed doors, probably about the same amount as I know about their countless relationships) when it comes to finances and money so she can really get a grasp on her checkbook. Besides, we won't know anyone in Seattle, so the invitation to go out weekly won't be there.
So in all these rambles - I guess I just have to say that I am glad with how things are going. And I truly miss Dane. It's funny cause this whole summer I've been like "WHHHOOOO!!!!!" And now that I finally start to REALLY REALLY miss Dane, it's time to leave. So I'm like "Eh, I'll see him in two weeks. WWWHHHHOOOOOOO!!!" HAAH! Just kidding. I missed him a lot this weekend.
*raises cup* To Seattle AND BEYOOONNNDDD!!!!
Monday, August 08, 2005
This Just In!
I haven't heard from the Salvation Army in over a week and a half so I think that they filled the position. I'm a little shocked that I haven't heard from them telling me that they filled it, but whatever. I thought since they were talking about flying me up there that I was at least in the finals. Whatever.
AND THEN I got a call this morning from Becca at The Salvation Army apologizing for not calling me back and asking if I could fly up for an interview. I said I was fairly booked over the next 3 weeks between meetings, packing, lunches, dinners, seminars, finals, and other stuff so we worked out a second phone interview with the Director of Finance and the Director of Human Resources. It's next Wednesday at 4:15. I have a feeling that they want me, but I'm still nervous and scared that the director's might not like me. We'll see.
AHHH, it will be so nice if I have a job when I get to Seattle, then when I take a week off - it will really be like a vacation. Well, if it was meant to be, it will happen.
AND THEN I got a call this morning from Becca at The Salvation Army apologizing for not calling me back and asking if I could fly up for an interview. I said I was fairly booked over the next 3 weeks between meetings, packing, lunches, dinners, seminars, finals, and other stuff so we worked out a second phone interview with the Director of Finance and the Director of Human Resources. It's next Wednesday at 4:15. I have a feeling that they want me, but I'm still nervous and scared that the director's might not like me. We'll see.
AHHH, it will be so nice if I have a job when I get to Seattle, then when I take a week off - it will really be like a vacation. Well, if it was meant to be, it will happen.
Out of the Frying Pan....
And into the fire! These last 3 weeks are going to FLY by!! I have so much to do!! The garage sale was a success, after I took my cut, paid for breakfast and 2 lunches for Rhi and I, and expenses, Dane and I pocketed over $300. Considering most of this stuff was given to us to begin with and/or we would have been happy donating it, I think $300 is not bad! Basically it will pay for the passage to Washington which includes gas, meals, and one stay at a hotel. I got the kitty sedatives, started packing the garage, sorted through throw away stuff and donation stuff - I'm on a roll!!
This weekend was fun yet exhausting, you would not believe how tiring it is to sit in the shade and sell stuff. Well, we were also moving stuff around, jumping up and down all over the place. On Friday it was nonstop from 6:30 am - 12:30 pm our longest break lasting 10 min and 48 seconds (I was on the phone w/ Dane the whole time, that's how I know). Saturday was really slow, I closed by noon. In the evening I joined Rhi for a hockey game Kate was playing in, MAN can she skate and play or what!! She was the cleaniest skater out there, very graceful. All the other skaters where tripping over themselves trying to keep up with her. Afterwards we went to D&B with some teammates. That was fun for a while, but I wanted something more upbeat, so we went to Croc's. Had time for one drink then went home. We stayed up for a while but I was exhausted and crashed out in my comfy bed. Rhi time traveled on the couch. Sunday was a completely useless day, spent entirely on the couch watching movies and reading (I am reading The Thorn Birds). I broke down and went grocery shopping - I am so sick of fast food, but frozen food isn't much better. :( I am packing up the kitchen next weekend, so the food I had to get had to be something that wouldn't dirty a dish.
*sigh* Life is moving fast around me. A girl is just lucky to keep up.
This weekend was fun yet exhausting, you would not believe how tiring it is to sit in the shade and sell stuff. Well, we were also moving stuff around, jumping up and down all over the place. On Friday it was nonstop from 6:30 am - 12:30 pm our longest break lasting 10 min and 48 seconds (I was on the phone w/ Dane the whole time, that's how I know). Saturday was really slow, I closed by noon. In the evening I joined Rhi for a hockey game Kate was playing in, MAN can she skate and play or what!! She was the cleaniest skater out there, very graceful. All the other skaters where tripping over themselves trying to keep up with her. Afterwards we went to D&B with some teammates. That was fun for a while, but I wanted something more upbeat, so we went to Croc's. Had time for one drink then went home. We stayed up for a while but I was exhausted and crashed out in my comfy bed. Rhi time traveled on the couch. Sunday was a completely useless day, spent entirely on the couch watching movies and reading (I am reading The Thorn Birds). I broke down and went grocery shopping - I am so sick of fast food, but frozen food isn't much better. :( I am packing up the kitchen next weekend, so the food I had to get had to be something that wouldn't dirty a dish.
*sigh* Life is moving fast around me. A girl is just lucky to keep up.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Tick Tock Tick Tock
Time is moving slower than a pregnant snail. Now that I want to leave, things seem to be excruciating. I can't believe it is only the 2nd of August at the same time that I can't believe it IS the 2nd of August! In four weeks I will be driving to Tri-Cities, Washington. Wow.
I am so wishy washy. I think it's just my general age in life but also the events that I am working through. One second I don't want to go and I'm all confused, the very next second I'm all gung ho ready to go. I need to find the happy medium and just hang out there for the next 4 weeks. Enjoy my last moments in Colorado but positively look forward to my future in Washington. I've developed a list of things that I want to change about myself and habits I want to break somewhere between the Oregon and Washington borders.
1. I want more time with Dane and less time with acquaintances.
2. I want to eat healthier, I hope to find one of those Super Supper places in WA. http://www.suppersolutionsinc.com/
3. I want to wake up earlier and have more time for myself in the morning (actually eat breakfast at home, read the paper or a magazine, go for a walk)
4. I want to start going for evening walks with Dane
5. I want to cut back on spending and do my belly dance on tapes
6. I want to do yoga at least 3 times a week
7. I want to make my home a comfy place that I want to live in and come home to with decor and personal touches - I don't want it to be a mess or boring or anything like the Lameria house was.
8. I want to have more time for art, music, and dance.
Crap - this blog is tragically cut short due to my need to train the LOSER JOE!!!
I am so wishy washy. I think it's just my general age in life but also the events that I am working through. One second I don't want to go and I'm all confused, the very next second I'm all gung ho ready to go. I need to find the happy medium and just hang out there for the next 4 weeks. Enjoy my last moments in Colorado but positively look forward to my future in Washington. I've developed a list of things that I want to change about myself and habits I want to break somewhere between the Oregon and Washington borders.
1. I want more time with Dane and less time with acquaintances.
2. I want to eat healthier, I hope to find one of those Super Supper places in WA. http://www.suppersolutionsinc.com/
3. I want to wake up earlier and have more time for myself in the morning (actually eat breakfast at home, read the paper or a magazine, go for a walk)
4. I want to start going for evening walks with Dane
5. I want to cut back on spending and do my belly dance on tapes
6. I want to do yoga at least 3 times a week
7. I want to make my home a comfy place that I want to live in and come home to with decor and personal touches - I don't want it to be a mess or boring or anything like the Lameria house was.
8. I want to have more time for art, music, and dance.
Crap - this blog is tragically cut short due to my need to train the LOSER JOE!!!
Monday, August 01, 2005
Seattle or Bust Revisited!
I went back and looked at my April postings surrounding the initial idea to move to Seattle - as soon as we got the news, the waiting period, the offer, and since. And I thought I would revisit the FAQ's from April. I have decided to post both the original post and the revised post (in that order).
1. When will you leave?
Dane leaves for Seattle on April 24th. He will be back in Denver the end of May and *maybe* June (if we go to Jamaica/other). I will not leave till the end of September. I have school, work, rental lease, and other loose ends to tie up in Denver.
By now we all know that Dane has already left. My last day at the office will be August 26th, I am having a moving party August 28th, and I will leave with the truck, FXYLADY, 2 cats, and the Rhi on Monday morning, August 29th. Bon Voyage!
2. Does this mean I will never see Dane again?:
No. Friday, April 22nd, we are going to have a get-together to congratulate Dane on his job and see him off with warm hugs and wishes. Special guest appearances by Peck and (hopefully) Paula. The end of September will host the official going-away party for me and Dane.
At this point, Dane has already come and gone several times throughout the summer. We are not planning another visit for Dane nor are we having another going-away party, mine was July 15th.
3. What about the Luau?:
I am sorry, but the Luau is cancelled.
The luau was cancelled but we enjoyed a great luau at Randall and Shawndell's house in June.
4. Why are you moving to Seattle?:
Dane is moving because he was offered a great job opportunity complete with better pay, benefits, fringe benefits, better/bigger company, etc. I am moving because my options are: move with Dane or leave him. There is no question what I am choosing. I am excited to go to Seattle because I can learn the art of belly dance from the dazzling Delilah delightening and the lucious Laura Rose. :) Seattle is also bigger and has a bigger accounting community - for reasons I do not know. Seattle also has great universities for me to attend.
Dane is enjoying his great job and glad he made the move. So far he loves Seattle. I don't know if I will belly dance with Delilah live, I may just use her videos and occasionally attend workshops. I think I will be very picky about how I spend my free time and I would prefer to focus more energy on yoga. In the end though, I am moving to Seattle for a fresh start with Dane. I have a lot of baggage and weight on my "tree" in Colorado. Uprooting to a new place will give me the chance to shake the dead wood and branch off in new directions.
5. Is there a UOP in Seattle?:
Yes - there are 5 UOP locations for me to choose from. From there I will most likely attend Seattle University for my dual master's program.
While there are 5 UOP locations, there is only one location that teaches my program...on Saturdays...half online half on campus....But it will be okay. Since the accounting program there is 6 months behind me, I will fill September through March with 3 elective courses and a couple weeks off here and there. I will start my accounting program where I left off here on March 18 in a southern Seattle campus. From there I don't know what I will do, probably continue on with my Master's and get my CPA no later than 2010. After that I am still considering a law degree, however I don't feel that I will do it concurrently with my Master's in accounting.
6. Where will Dane live when he's in Seattle?:
Dane will reside in corporate housing until I come up in September. The house has high speed internet.
He still lives there but is currently house hunting for us.
7. Are you going to see Dane after he moves to Seattle? Will you be lonely?:
I will see Dane in May and June in Denver. I will probably fly up to Seattle to see him in July, August, and September so I can assume a job and help with the house hunting process. Yes, we will be extremely lonely and miss each other a lot, but we will both have a lot going on to keep us occupied. And there's always late night yahoo. :)
We have both been really lonely and confused and this has definitely taken a toll on us. I have been up to Seattle once, he has been to Denver twice, we went to Moab together, and had a rendez-vous in Portland. There has not been late night yahoo. There has been too much going on to keep us occupied.
8. How is Rhi handling this?:
Rhi is a trooper. She realizes this is a step Dane and I have to make and is supportive and helpful to the enth degree. She is considering her options at this time and will probably make more concrete decisions as the summer wears on. She is sad, but understands (better than I did at her age I might add) that this is a simple fact of life. We are all aware that distance in location does not mean there has to be a distance in friendship.
Rhi is still handling it well. We both feel that the relationship is not ready to be over yet, but we aren't sure what that means at this time. It will definitely be an adjustment for both of us to acclimate to life without each other, as we are both very dependent on each other in some ways, but we will persevere. It will be okay. I know we will always keep in touch.
9. Are you scared?:
I'm spooked outta my g*d-d*mned mind!! I have never cut the apron strings (so to speak). Although I have lived on my own for a while, I have never really been away from mommy and daddy and that will be a big adjustment for me to make. But I'm just as excited as I am scared.
I am still scared. But that comes and goes and now I tend to feel more excitement. Course that will change in another week so keep posted.
10. Will you have to rely on Dane?:
For what? No. Dane and I have always been both self-sufficient and each other's number one resource. I plan to have a job upon my arrival in Seattle. If not, then Dane and I will help each other out so that we realize the right path in the right time.
At this time, I will be paid through September which gives me the whole month of September without cutting into my savings to find a job. I have not heard back from Hopelink or Salvation Army so I assume that I did not get the job. Which is fine, I get the feeling that I have some worth while qualities and won't have any difficulty finding a job when the time is right. If nothing else, I have several contacts for temp work. To answer shortly - no, I will not be relying on Dane financially. For everything else though, he will be my #1 resource!
11. How do you feel about leaving C&C?:
I am very sad. Again, there was/is no question regarding my decision to follow Dane out to Seattle. Having said that, I am making certain concessions to be with him. Leaving an absolutely fabulous dream job is one of them. I have all the flexibility, benefits, mentoring, great pay, etc. that a 25 yr old could possibly want here. I love the people, I love the mission, I love what I do, I love my office, I love it. However, having said that - there is something to be said for being too comfortable and (as my friend Joe pointed out today) stagnant. He never stays at a job longer than 2 years and explained that he gets more experience that way, never gets bored or comfortable. I like that. I never planned on staying at C&C my whole career (thank you Paula) and as the beautiful Gwen Stefani would say "Whatchu waiting for? Take a chance, you stupid hoe. Take a chance cause you might grow."
If I wasn't already leaving, I would be leaving. I cannot believe what the powers that be are doing to such a formerly great nonprofit. They are raping the mission, depleting all funds, and ignoring the public outcry. Our employees have not received a raise in almost 2 years, many who were hired on at entry level have accepted promotions without pay increases and still work for their entry level pay. On the other hand, the company is so frivilous that they pay TWO CEO's a total of $210,000/year!!!!!! What they make individually is outrageous for a nonprofit our size let alone paying TWO PEOPLE that amount!! And one of the CEO's is completely unqualified!! No degree, no experience, she micro-manages, she belittles her employees. A horrible, horrible CEO. On top of that, I have climbed as far as I can here. My job no longer has any challenges, I can do it in my sleep. It's time to move on.
1. When will you leave?
Dane leaves for Seattle on April 24th. He will be back in Denver the end of May and *maybe* June (if we go to Jamaica/other). I will not leave till the end of September. I have school, work, rental lease, and other loose ends to tie up in Denver.
By now we all know that Dane has already left. My last day at the office will be August 26th, I am having a moving party August 28th, and I will leave with the truck, FXYLADY, 2 cats, and the Rhi on Monday morning, August 29th. Bon Voyage!
2. Does this mean I will never see Dane again?:
No. Friday, April 22nd, we are going to have a get-together to congratulate Dane on his job and see him off with warm hugs and wishes. Special guest appearances by Peck and (hopefully) Paula. The end of September will host the official going-away party for me and Dane.
At this point, Dane has already come and gone several times throughout the summer. We are not planning another visit for Dane nor are we having another going-away party, mine was July 15th.
3. What about the Luau?:
I am sorry, but the Luau is cancelled.
The luau was cancelled but we enjoyed a great luau at Randall and Shawndell's house in June.
4. Why are you moving to Seattle?:
Dane is moving because he was offered a great job opportunity complete with better pay, benefits, fringe benefits, better/bigger company, etc. I am moving because my options are: move with Dane or leave him. There is no question what I am choosing. I am excited to go to Seattle because I can learn the art of belly dance from the dazzling Delilah delightening and the lucious Laura Rose. :) Seattle is also bigger and has a bigger accounting community - for reasons I do not know. Seattle also has great universities for me to attend.
Dane is enjoying his great job and glad he made the move. So far he loves Seattle. I don't know if I will belly dance with Delilah live, I may just use her videos and occasionally attend workshops. I think I will be very picky about how I spend my free time and I would prefer to focus more energy on yoga. In the end though, I am moving to Seattle for a fresh start with Dane. I have a lot of baggage and weight on my "tree" in Colorado. Uprooting to a new place will give me the chance to shake the dead wood and branch off in new directions.
5. Is there a UOP in Seattle?:
Yes - there are 5 UOP locations for me to choose from. From there I will most likely attend Seattle University for my dual master's program.
While there are 5 UOP locations, there is only one location that teaches my program...on Saturdays...half online half on campus....But it will be okay. Since the accounting program there is 6 months behind me, I will fill September through March with 3 elective courses and a couple weeks off here and there. I will start my accounting program where I left off here on March 18 in a southern Seattle campus. From there I don't know what I will do, probably continue on with my Master's and get my CPA no later than 2010. After that I am still considering a law degree, however I don't feel that I will do it concurrently with my Master's in accounting.
6. Where will Dane live when he's in Seattle?:
Dane will reside in corporate housing until I come up in September. The house has high speed internet.
He still lives there but is currently house hunting for us.
7. Are you going to see Dane after he moves to Seattle? Will you be lonely?:
I will see Dane in May and June in Denver. I will probably fly up to Seattle to see him in July, August, and September so I can assume a job and help with the house hunting process. Yes, we will be extremely lonely and miss each other a lot, but we will both have a lot going on to keep us occupied. And there's always late night yahoo. :)
We have both been really lonely and confused and this has definitely taken a toll on us. I have been up to Seattle once, he has been to Denver twice, we went to Moab together, and had a rendez-vous in Portland. There has not been late night yahoo. There has been too much going on to keep us occupied.
8. How is Rhi handling this?:
Rhi is a trooper. She realizes this is a step Dane and I have to make and is supportive and helpful to the enth degree. She is considering her options at this time and will probably make more concrete decisions as the summer wears on. She is sad, but understands (better than I did at her age I might add) that this is a simple fact of life. We are all aware that distance in location does not mean there has to be a distance in friendship.
Rhi is still handling it well. We both feel that the relationship is not ready to be over yet, but we aren't sure what that means at this time. It will definitely be an adjustment for both of us to acclimate to life without each other, as we are both very dependent on each other in some ways, but we will persevere. It will be okay. I know we will always keep in touch.
9. Are you scared?:
I'm spooked outta my g*d-d*mned mind!! I have never cut the apron strings (so to speak). Although I have lived on my own for a while, I have never really been away from mommy and daddy and that will be a big adjustment for me to make. But I'm just as excited as I am scared.
I am still scared. But that comes and goes and now I tend to feel more excitement. Course that will change in another week so keep posted.
10. Will you have to rely on Dane?:
For what? No. Dane and I have always been both self-sufficient and each other's number one resource. I plan to have a job upon my arrival in Seattle. If not, then Dane and I will help each other out so that we realize the right path in the right time.
At this time, I will be paid through September which gives me the whole month of September without cutting into my savings to find a job. I have not heard back from Hopelink or Salvation Army so I assume that I did not get the job. Which is fine, I get the feeling that I have some worth while qualities and won't have any difficulty finding a job when the time is right. If nothing else, I have several contacts for temp work. To answer shortly - no, I will not be relying on Dane financially. For everything else though, he will be my #1 resource!
11. How do you feel about leaving C&C?:
I am very sad. Again, there was/is no question regarding my decision to follow Dane out to Seattle. Having said that, I am making certain concessions to be with him. Leaving an absolutely fabulous dream job is one of them. I have all the flexibility, benefits, mentoring, great pay, etc. that a 25 yr old could possibly want here. I love the people, I love the mission, I love what I do, I love my office, I love it. However, having said that - there is something to be said for being too comfortable and (as my friend Joe pointed out today) stagnant. He never stays at a job longer than 2 years and explained that he gets more experience that way, never gets bored or comfortable. I like that. I never planned on staying at C&C my whole career (thank you Paula) and as the beautiful Gwen Stefani would say "Whatchu waiting for? Take a chance, you stupid hoe. Take a chance cause you might grow."
If I wasn't already leaving, I would be leaving. I cannot believe what the powers that be are doing to such a formerly great nonprofit. They are raping the mission, depleting all funds, and ignoring the public outcry. Our employees have not received a raise in almost 2 years, many who were hired on at entry level have accepted promotions without pay increases and still work for their entry level pay. On the other hand, the company is so frivilous that they pay TWO CEO's a total of $210,000/year!!!!!! What they make individually is outrageous for a nonprofit our size let alone paying TWO PEOPLE that amount!! And one of the CEO's is completely unqualified!! No degree, no experience, she micro-manages, she belittles her employees. A horrible, horrible CEO. On top of that, I have climbed as far as I can here. My job no longer has any challenges, I can do it in my sleep. It's time to move on.
Ready...Set...GO!
I wish I could time travel to August 29th! This weekend was a lot of fun. We got a lot of work and play accomplished. Sam has started moving out, items that we don't want have made their way to the garage for sale. It's becoming physically obvious that Dane and I are moving. What has also become obvious is how I feel. I am ready to move. No longer confused, I am simply just waiting for time to pass. I'll explain further.
I've met a lot of new people in the past two months. Unfortunately I have been very confused during the last couple months and that presents a false image of not only who I am, but who I am with Dane. These wonderful people pick up on my fears and confusion and unwittingly perpetuate it - probing me for answers and justifications. Even people I have known for a while have second guessed my quest. All this and many other things have contributed to my craze. I have done an enormous amount of soul searching the last couple of weeks and have made immense progress - both over the course of two weekends and sometimes in a matter of two seconds. It boils down to the following: when Dane and I made the decision to go to Seattle (it was a joint effort for those who don't know or remember - I knew from the get go that the only way Dane would go is if I would, it sounded fun, I was ready for something different, and I would never stand in the way of this opportunity for Dane), we were in a stable, comfortable position. There was low drama in our life and the idea of a new, exciting city was irresistible. Understand, however, that that was over 4 months ago. We have been in limbo for a while. Had there only been 4 weeks between the decision and move, things might have been different - perhaps easier. Instead, we have had to deal with a myriad of emotions and hardships that even under normal circumstances would cause difficulties. Dane and I are away from each other, I am moving for the FIRST time in my life - I am a Denver native. Digging up my deep, deep roots and putting them in new soil is scary! I am in the middle of INTENSE accounting classes with an overwhelming amount of homework and material to cover. I am training my replacement at work - a task that I am almost ill prepared for. I have not had the time to do the things I love like yoga and belly dance. All these things have contributed to the unstability I feel in my life. Add a cute guy on that and you've got one freaked out chick. And understandably so.
It's taken 2 weeks and lots of rooting around for the causes of my confusion and anxiety, but I have discovered them as well as my conclusion. When my life was stable and I was in a calm atmosphere, I made a decision to move to Seattle. And no matter how scary it is, I know in my heart of hearts that it is the right move for me. Making a decision to stay in Denver just because of fear would be rash and possibly lead to even more heartache and confusion. Once I realized this, my fear literally evaporated and the anxiety was overcome with excitement to leave Denver and join my partner for my new life in Seattle.
I've met a lot of new people in the past two months. Unfortunately I have been very confused during the last couple months and that presents a false image of not only who I am, but who I am with Dane. These wonderful people pick up on my fears and confusion and unwittingly perpetuate it - probing me for answers and justifications. Even people I have known for a while have second guessed my quest. All this and many other things have contributed to my craze. I have done an enormous amount of soul searching the last couple of weeks and have made immense progress - both over the course of two weekends and sometimes in a matter of two seconds. It boils down to the following: when Dane and I made the decision to go to Seattle (it was a joint effort for those who don't know or remember - I knew from the get go that the only way Dane would go is if I would, it sounded fun, I was ready for something different, and I would never stand in the way of this opportunity for Dane), we were in a stable, comfortable position. There was low drama in our life and the idea of a new, exciting city was irresistible. Understand, however, that that was over 4 months ago. We have been in limbo for a while. Had there only been 4 weeks between the decision and move, things might have been different - perhaps easier. Instead, we have had to deal with a myriad of emotions and hardships that even under normal circumstances would cause difficulties. Dane and I are away from each other, I am moving for the FIRST time in my life - I am a Denver native. Digging up my deep, deep roots and putting them in new soil is scary! I am in the middle of INTENSE accounting classes with an overwhelming amount of homework and material to cover. I am training my replacement at work - a task that I am almost ill prepared for. I have not had the time to do the things I love like yoga and belly dance. All these things have contributed to the unstability I feel in my life. Add a cute guy on that and you've got one freaked out chick. And understandably so.
It's taken 2 weeks and lots of rooting around for the causes of my confusion and anxiety, but I have discovered them as well as my conclusion. When my life was stable and I was in a calm atmosphere, I made a decision to move to Seattle. And no matter how scary it is, I know in my heart of hearts that it is the right move for me. Making a decision to stay in Denver just because of fear would be rash and possibly lead to even more heartache and confusion. Once I realized this, my fear literally evaporated and the anxiety was overcome with excitement to leave Denver and join my partner for my new life in Seattle.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Time Travel
Peck is in town. Really the blog would be complete with that first sentence, but for story's sake I'll divulge.
So I met with Rhi at Lodo's and we quietly drank a beer waiting for Peck, Amy, and Dee to show up. They showed up one by one during the second beer and we sat and chatted, caught up, played music trivia, and heckled the Time Warner employees from all over the states: Memphis, Orlando, Atlanta, Manhattan, Santa Barbara, Orange County, Portland, and a few others. Before I knew what happened, we were toasted!! Dancing, talking to everyone at the bar, play fighting, text messaging Dane in incomplete thoughts and sentences. It was a great time!!! I got home around 1 I think and immediately passed out on the lawn. After bugs started crawling up my legs I decided to muster up all my strength and sobriety and make it up to my room or inside at least. I staggered up the stairs and crashed into poor Sam's door, waking him up. I passed out there for a while, Sam came out and was like "Wow. On a Wednesday?" I finally made it to my room and that was it. Dee and Peck came over soon after that and Dee helped me take off my jewelry and jacket and put a cold cloth on my head. She was going to put me in the bed, but we all stopped her from making that mistake. That's the last thing I remember. I time traveled to 7:30 am and then jumped into bed and slept till 10 arriving at work at 11:45.
In other news, it sounds like I have a real shot at the Salvation Army job - I will post more as the information comes in.
Note to self: do not forget to pick up Dane tonight. YEAH!!
So I met with Rhi at Lodo's and we quietly drank a beer waiting for Peck, Amy, and Dee to show up. They showed up one by one during the second beer and we sat and chatted, caught up, played music trivia, and heckled the Time Warner employees from all over the states: Memphis, Orlando, Atlanta, Manhattan, Santa Barbara, Orange County, Portland, and a few others. Before I knew what happened, we were toasted!! Dancing, talking to everyone at the bar, play fighting, text messaging Dane in incomplete thoughts and sentences. It was a great time!!! I got home around 1 I think and immediately passed out on the lawn. After bugs started crawling up my legs I decided to muster up all my strength and sobriety and make it up to my room or inside at least. I staggered up the stairs and crashed into poor Sam's door, waking him up. I passed out there for a while, Sam came out and was like "Wow. On a Wednesday?" I finally made it to my room and that was it. Dee and Peck came over soon after that and Dee helped me take off my jewelry and jacket and put a cold cloth on my head. She was going to put me in the bed, but we all stopped her from making that mistake. That's the last thing I remember. I time traveled to 7:30 am and then jumped into bed and slept till 10 arriving at work at 11:45.
In other news, it sounds like I have a real shot at the Salvation Army job - I will post more as the information comes in.
Note to self: do not forget to pick up Dane tonight. YEAH!!
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
All I've Ever Wanted
So we all know that I have been confused and scared lately for a variety of reasons, namely - I am moving away from all that is secure and known to a place that is literally exotic compared to what I am comfortable with. I am scared of the constantly changing relationship I have with Dane. We all know that I sought some sort of comfort with Blue then quickly realized that I didn't want to push the boundaries with Dane. So in an effort to allieviate the confusion and find a ground zero I met with Dane in Portland for a rendez-vous.
I flew standby to PDX and got on the 8 o'clock flight by the skin of my teeth. I arrived in Portland and immediately went to work at the C&C PDX office - this was cool because I was able to log a full days work, get stuff done at the PDX office at little expense to the company. I spent the afternoon training Kelly and waiting for Dane. We met up at 5:30 and went to the Mark Spencer hotel, the only hotel available. We got ready, I wore my new black cocktail dress that Dane purchased for me the last time he was in Denver but in my haste to pack, I neglected to pack a pair of undies and each time the wind flared up, so would my dress. On top of that, I only packed what I was going to wear, nothing extra - a first for me, I always pack extra stuff "just in case". I didn't even pack my glasses - I had no room. Well my one and only black halter top with built in bra combusted, so I had no shirt for Saturday. So Dane and I made a B-line for a mall to look for undies and a shirt. We found a mall downtown and luckily Express had a really cute top on sale ($14.99) and across from Express was Victoria's Secret where I found the most comfortable, perfect thong ever!!!! With the crisis adverted, Dane and I walked to 4th and Washington to a Greek restaurant that had great food and live entertainment. We listened to Greek music, danced and participated in Greek traditions including flinging plates and the famous "Oupa!" shots. It was a great time. I ended up drinking more than I should have so Dane and I called it an early night.
Saturday we walked the Pearl District, got my nails fixed and a pedicure, ate lunch at a great Chinese restaurant, drank Starbucks on the street car, browsed used book and clothing stores, and then made our way to the hippest boutique hotel in Portland (how Dane pulled strings to get us in is beside me) the Jupiter Hotel. Think college dorm meets Travelodge. People would pull kegs into their rooms, leave the doors wide open, party all night, urban decor, awesome awesome place. Except I had a killer headache and my eye was swollen and red. We took a nap then decided to find a place to eat. Not convinced that the food at the Jupiter would be any better than a greasy spoon pad, I wanted to walk around. Dane thought we should stay. We walked around for almost 2 hours over 35 blocks and found nothing worth while. We finally went back to Jupiter exhausted and sat down for dinner to find ourselves having amazing food at amazing prices. I had to smile at myself and the situation and the irony of it all. I put my fork down, grabbed Dane's hand and said "Sometimes you have to look all over town at what's available to discover that what you wanted most was right there all along, all yours." He sat there stunned for a moment then admitted that he wasn't sure what to feel but that it was an astounding analogy. I smiled, he smiled and we enjoyed the rest of our night very quietly admist the partiers of Portland.
Sunday we made the most of our urban, freaky room before checking out. We took a cab to the Lloyd Center and arrived just in time to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. During the trailers, the lights came on and the movie stopped. Confused, we looked around to find that a woman in the back row had died - not breathing, not moving, just sitting there mouth agape. There was no panic, just silence, stillness, and confusion. Dane and I were wondering why no one was doing anything but almost instantly the paramedics arrived. An older man claiming to be the woman's son said "Please do not rescusitate her, I have her DNR orders right here, this is not the first time this has happened." The paramedics obliged and moved to pick her up and move her out of the theatre, when they did so, the woman's neck flopped forward and it was obvious that she was not alive. I ran out the theatre to fake stand in line at the concession stand just to see if the paramedics would honor her wishes. Normally paramedics don't (and shouldn't) honor DNR orders. A piece of history, DNR orders are for people who are already admitted into a hospital for a procedure or surgery of some sort, they are not meant to be honored in emergent situations where you are not stabilized. But in this case the son had the orders and provided all the information necessary and we all just stood around and waited patiently and compassionately for the woman to die. When she was pronounced dead, they put a blanket over her and wheeled her away, the son apologized to the theatre who in return shouted their condolences. The staff members passed out free movie passes for the "inconvenience" and the movie went on as planned. After the tramatic events and the good humored movie, Dane and I walked to the mall but could not stash our bags anywhere while we shopped. Instead we noticed an ice rink and it just so happened to be public skating. We rented skates and had a very impromptu, romantic afternoon ice skating. Afterwards we left each other, I to the East on the Max, Dane to the West in a cab. I was bound for a plane, he for a train.
It was sad leaving him again, but not quite as bad this time for I will see him again soon. I maintain that airports are the place to go to pick up on people - once again I was hit on at the PDX airport, I was flattered and embarrassed. I always feel bad when guys have enough guts to ask me out and I have to tell them that I have a partner. It makes things so awkward. I got a seat on the plane right away and slept most of the way back to Denver. Once home (for now) I talked to Peck all the way home, she is in town this week. We had fun and giggled and made plans for the week.
All in all it was a good weekend. I'm less confused now and things are settling back into place. I interviewed with the Salvation Army for an hour yesterday - first time I wore a tank top, Cubs hat, and smoked during an interview (I like this whole phone interview thing). We'll see if I hear back from them. I'm nervous about joining such a right wing religious nonprofit, but the Salvation Army is as people-compassionate as one can get. I'm not sure, we'll see.
I flew standby to PDX and got on the 8 o'clock flight by the skin of my teeth. I arrived in Portland and immediately went to work at the C&C PDX office - this was cool because I was able to log a full days work, get stuff done at the PDX office at little expense to the company. I spent the afternoon training Kelly and waiting for Dane. We met up at 5:30 and went to the Mark Spencer hotel, the only hotel available. We got ready, I wore my new black cocktail dress that Dane purchased for me the last time he was in Denver but in my haste to pack, I neglected to pack a pair of undies and each time the wind flared up, so would my dress. On top of that, I only packed what I was going to wear, nothing extra - a first for me, I always pack extra stuff "just in case". I didn't even pack my glasses - I had no room. Well my one and only black halter top with built in bra combusted, so I had no shirt for Saturday. So Dane and I made a B-line for a mall to look for undies and a shirt. We found a mall downtown and luckily Express had a really cute top on sale ($14.99) and across from Express was Victoria's Secret where I found the most comfortable, perfect thong ever!!!! With the crisis adverted, Dane and I walked to 4th and Washington to a Greek restaurant that had great food and live entertainment. We listened to Greek music, danced and participated in Greek traditions including flinging plates and the famous "Oupa!" shots. It was a great time. I ended up drinking more than I should have so Dane and I called it an early night.
Saturday we walked the Pearl District, got my nails fixed and a pedicure, ate lunch at a great Chinese restaurant, drank Starbucks on the street car, browsed used book and clothing stores, and then made our way to the hippest boutique hotel in Portland (how Dane pulled strings to get us in is beside me) the Jupiter Hotel. Think college dorm meets Travelodge. People would pull kegs into their rooms, leave the doors wide open, party all night, urban decor, awesome awesome place. Except I had a killer headache and my eye was swollen and red. We took a nap then decided to find a place to eat. Not convinced that the food at the Jupiter would be any better than a greasy spoon pad, I wanted to walk around. Dane thought we should stay. We walked around for almost 2 hours over 35 blocks and found nothing worth while. We finally went back to Jupiter exhausted and sat down for dinner to find ourselves having amazing food at amazing prices. I had to smile at myself and the situation and the irony of it all. I put my fork down, grabbed Dane's hand and said "Sometimes you have to look all over town at what's available to discover that what you wanted most was right there all along, all yours." He sat there stunned for a moment then admitted that he wasn't sure what to feel but that it was an astounding analogy. I smiled, he smiled and we enjoyed the rest of our night very quietly admist the partiers of Portland.
Sunday we made the most of our urban, freaky room before checking out. We took a cab to the Lloyd Center and arrived just in time to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. During the trailers, the lights came on and the movie stopped. Confused, we looked around to find that a woman in the back row had died - not breathing, not moving, just sitting there mouth agape. There was no panic, just silence, stillness, and confusion. Dane and I were wondering why no one was doing anything but almost instantly the paramedics arrived. An older man claiming to be the woman's son said "Please do not rescusitate her, I have her DNR orders right here, this is not the first time this has happened." The paramedics obliged and moved to pick her up and move her out of the theatre, when they did so, the woman's neck flopped forward and it was obvious that she was not alive. I ran out the theatre to fake stand in line at the concession stand just to see if the paramedics would honor her wishes. Normally paramedics don't (and shouldn't) honor DNR orders. A piece of history, DNR orders are for people who are already admitted into a hospital for a procedure or surgery of some sort, they are not meant to be honored in emergent situations where you are not stabilized. But in this case the son had the orders and provided all the information necessary and we all just stood around and waited patiently and compassionately for the woman to die. When she was pronounced dead, they put a blanket over her and wheeled her away, the son apologized to the theatre who in return shouted their condolences. The staff members passed out free movie passes for the "inconvenience" and the movie went on as planned. After the tramatic events and the good humored movie, Dane and I walked to the mall but could not stash our bags anywhere while we shopped. Instead we noticed an ice rink and it just so happened to be public skating. We rented skates and had a very impromptu, romantic afternoon ice skating. Afterwards we left each other, I to the East on the Max, Dane to the West in a cab. I was bound for a plane, he for a train.
It was sad leaving him again, but not quite as bad this time for I will see him again soon. I maintain that airports are the place to go to pick up on people - once again I was hit on at the PDX airport, I was flattered and embarrassed. I always feel bad when guys have enough guts to ask me out and I have to tell them that I have a partner. It makes things so awkward. I got a seat on the plane right away and slept most of the way back to Denver. Once home (for now) I talked to Peck all the way home, she is in town this week. We had fun and giggled and made plans for the week.
All in all it was a good weekend. I'm less confused now and things are settling back into place. I interviewed with the Salvation Army for an hour yesterday - first time I wore a tank top, Cubs hat, and smoked during an interview (I like this whole phone interview thing). We'll see if I hear back from them. I'm nervous about joining such a right wing religious nonprofit, but the Salvation Army is as people-compassionate as one can get. I'm not sure, we'll see.
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
THESE are the facts.....
I love Dane. I miss Dane. My life is with Dane.
I am freaking out because I am scared. I am scared he will leave me now that he's well-to-do and can find someone better so I prepare a plan B, or Blue as the case may be. I am scared to leave Denver, I am scared to start a new life in a new city far away from all that is comfortable. I am scared to admit that this long-distance thing is really hard. I am scared to admit how much I really do love Dane.
Faced with the tormenting thought that he might not be around or that I might do something to compromise our relationship brought me to my knees in tears. I can't imagine losing him, especially to someone as silly as Blue. Blue is not even 1/10th the man Dane is - I'm such a silly woman. I am just scared and acting out.
Immediately I booked a flight to go see Dane this weekend - I have so much to do at home but I will lose my mind if I don't see him...NOW!!! I didn't even think about it, I just booked the flight and now we have all these arrangements to make and who is going to care for the cats and where will we stay - it's totally crazy!! I don't do stuff like this. But I have to see him, I have to. I can't wait another week, I don't care what I have to do or push off till next week or whatever - I HAVE to see him.
So toodles Blue, you are a great man - but I have an even greater man who is already in love with me and who I love back. There is no room for Blue in my black and white relationship with Dane. Only lots of polka dots. :)
I am freaking out because I am scared. I am scared he will leave me now that he's well-to-do and can find someone better so I prepare a plan B, or Blue as the case may be. I am scared to leave Denver, I am scared to start a new life in a new city far away from all that is comfortable. I am scared to admit that this long-distance thing is really hard. I am scared to admit how much I really do love Dane.
Faced with the tormenting thought that he might not be around or that I might do something to compromise our relationship brought me to my knees in tears. I can't imagine losing him, especially to someone as silly as Blue. Blue is not even 1/10th the man Dane is - I'm such a silly woman. I am just scared and acting out.
Immediately I booked a flight to go see Dane this weekend - I have so much to do at home but I will lose my mind if I don't see him...NOW!!! I didn't even think about it, I just booked the flight and now we have all these arrangements to make and who is going to care for the cats and where will we stay - it's totally crazy!! I don't do stuff like this. But I have to see him, I have to. I can't wait another week, I don't care what I have to do or push off till next week or whatever - I HAVE to see him.
So toodles Blue, you are a great man - but I have an even greater man who is already in love with me and who I love back. There is no room for Blue in my black and white relationship with Dane. Only lots of polka dots. :)
Sleepless in Seattle or Confused in Colorado
I am totally confused and I have absolutely no reason to be. Here are the facts:
1. I love Dane, he is my life partner, I am moving to Seattle to be with and grow old with him.
2. I am attracted to a blue collar, divorced man with 3 kids and a Datsun.
When I follow my thoughts through to conclusion, there is only one - but it doesn't clear any of my confusion. And then THAT confuses me why I am so confused?!?! I think "why am I even confused, I've been with Dane 4 years, I've seen Blue 4 times." But I can't explain it. He constantly probes me about Dane and what am I going to do and "if things were different". I just stare at him and think - "what am I doing". I look at him and all I can do is think of Dane. Every word that comes out of Blue's mouth is compared to what D would say. And I think - so what's the deal Crystal, why are you confused.
Then I get depressed and crawl into a dark place and wonder what is wrong with me. After doing a lot of soul searching last night I am still confused, but I realize that I am probably just going through some weirdo emotions because Dane is gone. Yeah sure Blue is sexy and a perfect gentleman and the amount of respect he has for me and Dane and our relationship makes him that much more attractive to me, but Dane is....Dane is...WOW. Dane is my Mr. Man. No one can replace him. No matter how good looking or how strong the mental connection is.
I love my Dane. I miss him. I want to be with him. *SIGH*
1. I love Dane, he is my life partner, I am moving to Seattle to be with and grow old with him.
2. I am attracted to a blue collar, divorced man with 3 kids and a Datsun.
When I follow my thoughts through to conclusion, there is only one - but it doesn't clear any of my confusion. And then THAT confuses me why I am so confused?!?! I think "why am I even confused, I've been with Dane 4 years, I've seen Blue 4 times." But I can't explain it. He constantly probes me about Dane and what am I going to do and "if things were different". I just stare at him and think - "what am I doing". I look at him and all I can do is think of Dane. Every word that comes out of Blue's mouth is compared to what D would say. And I think - so what's the deal Crystal, why are you confused.
Then I get depressed and crawl into a dark place and wonder what is wrong with me. After doing a lot of soul searching last night I am still confused, but I realize that I am probably just going through some weirdo emotions because Dane is gone. Yeah sure Blue is sexy and a perfect gentleman and the amount of respect he has for me and Dane and our relationship makes him that much more attractive to me, but Dane is....Dane is...WOW. Dane is my Mr. Man. No one can replace him. No matter how good looking or how strong the mental connection is.
I love my Dane. I miss him. I want to be with him. *SIGH*
Friday, July 15, 2005
Going Away
This weekend is my last weekend to cut loose. After this it's all work and no play. I planned my summer so that I could relax and have fun the 1st half and then work hard the last 6 weeks to complete all the tasks necessary to move. In retrospect I am glad I planned it that way. May and June were all about partying hard, whooping it up, and acting bad cause "dad's gone" (his words, not mine). Well now all that has worn off and I'm sitting here like "I really miss Dane" so luckily there has only been a few weeks of missing Dane and shuffling my feet around wondering what to do and where to go. After this weekend, I have my work cut out.
So here is my itinerary for the next 6 weeks/weekends:
3rd weekend in July: Dinner with Vince and Joe from JoeAb, SATC, lots of yardwork/cleaning, going away party at Bennigan's and Brunswick Zone in Lone Tree, Donor Dash, Botanic Gardens, and homework.
4th weekend in July: Organize and price all garage sale items and move into the garage, go through already packed/stored items and organize or prepare a trash/donation run, Zach's 2nd b-day, homework, yardwork.
5th weekend in July: Dane is in town to help with packing and pricing his garage sale stuff and stuff to take with us, move the heavy stuff into the garage for the sale, develop a packing/organizing method to easily ascertain what is in what box and where it will be located, pack the stuff we don't need.
1st weekend in August: Garage sale round 1 on Friday, round 2 on Saturday. From 7 - 2 (or later) Rhi and I (with special guest help) will be manning the garage sale. Other than that, we will do yardwork and rest!
2nd weekend in August: If I need to, I will have another garage sale on Saturday. If not, then I will make a couple trips to the Goodwill. Then once the garage is clear, I will start moving already packed boxes into the garage for easy loading.
3rd weekend in August: Rhi's dad will be in town, so I imagine I will go out once or twice with them to the Cubs game and maybe another place. Otherwise I will be packing up every room in the house save the bedroom furniture - I will pack the loft, computers, tv room, books, dance room, misc living areas, my clothes, most of the bathroom, all of the kitchen, most decorations. Rhi and I decided that the 3rd week in August would be "Honor Take-Out Restaurants" week where we would celebrate restaurants that offer take-out by eating take-out with plastic-ware. Actually all our dishes and cooking utensils will be packed.
4th weekend in August: Pack the bedrooms, pack any remaining stuff, move boxes into garage, clean the house like no tomorrow, stain the scratches on the doors, have a moving party on Sunday at 6:00 with pizza and beer where everyone comes over and for one hour we move all the stuff from the garage into the rental truck and then enjoy food and drink and fellowship.
August 29th, 9:00am: Push off for Seattle via SLC and Umatilla, WA.
So here is my itinerary for the next 6 weeks/weekends:
3rd weekend in July: Dinner with Vince and Joe from JoeAb, SATC, lots of yardwork/cleaning, going away party at Bennigan's and Brunswick Zone in Lone Tree, Donor Dash, Botanic Gardens, and homework.
4th weekend in July: Organize and price all garage sale items and move into the garage, go through already packed/stored items and organize or prepare a trash/donation run, Zach's 2nd b-day, homework, yardwork.
5th weekend in July: Dane is in town to help with packing and pricing his garage sale stuff and stuff to take with us, move the heavy stuff into the garage for the sale, develop a packing/organizing method to easily ascertain what is in what box and where it will be located, pack the stuff we don't need.
1st weekend in August: Garage sale round 1 on Friday, round 2 on Saturday. From 7 - 2 (or later) Rhi and I (with special guest help) will be manning the garage sale. Other than that, we will do yardwork and rest!
2nd weekend in August: If I need to, I will have another garage sale on Saturday. If not, then I will make a couple trips to the Goodwill. Then once the garage is clear, I will start moving already packed boxes into the garage for easy loading.
3rd weekend in August: Rhi's dad will be in town, so I imagine I will go out once or twice with them to the Cubs game and maybe another place. Otherwise I will be packing up every room in the house save the bedroom furniture - I will pack the loft, computers, tv room, books, dance room, misc living areas, my clothes, most of the bathroom, all of the kitchen, most decorations. Rhi and I decided that the 3rd week in August would be "Honor Take-Out Restaurants" week where we would celebrate restaurants that offer take-out by eating take-out with plastic-ware. Actually all our dishes and cooking utensils will be packed.
4th weekend in August: Pack the bedrooms, pack any remaining stuff, move boxes into garage, clean the house like no tomorrow, stain the scratches on the doors, have a moving party on Sunday at 6:00 with pizza and beer where everyone comes over and for one hour we move all the stuff from the garage into the rental truck and then enjoy food and drink and fellowship.
August 29th, 9:00am: Push off for Seattle via SLC and Umatilla, WA.
Monday, July 11, 2005
Six Minutes
In six minutes I will begin training again. So this will be fast. The weekend was nice - I've had some pretty confusing times this last week. I think it has to do with:
1. Dane coming and going
2. Outside influences
3. Tons of homework, housework, errands, and chores
4. No time to do yoga in over a week
5. Training Joe and the overwhelming task of replacing myself (that sounds worse than I mean it)
6. The "whoo-hoo Dad's gone" has worn off and I really miss Dane
7. I've lost weight but kind of let my diet plan slip away
All these things have contributed to a very irritated, depressed, confused Crystal. I will write more later as things become more clear to me and I have sorted out my feelings. I look forward to yoga tonight and so far my diet is back on track. I have also deleted some outside influences that have contributed to my confusion - I felt better immediately.
1. Dane coming and going
2. Outside influences
3. Tons of homework, housework, errands, and chores
4. No time to do yoga in over a week
5. Training Joe and the overwhelming task of replacing myself (that sounds worse than I mean it)
6. The "whoo-hoo Dad's gone" has worn off and I really miss Dane
7. I've lost weight but kind of let my diet plan slip away
All these things have contributed to a very irritated, depressed, confused Crystal. I will write more later as things become more clear to me and I have sorted out my feelings. I look forward to yoga tonight and so far my diet is back on track. I have also deleted some outside influences that have contributed to my confusion - I felt better immediately.
Thursday, July 07, 2005
Life
*sigh* I think the rep I have is somewhat unearned. I have this reputation for needing to control things and being bossy and whatever. Here's my take on it - some of the best managers and seminar leaders will tell you that delegation is one of the hardest things to learn for managers. Well I have that skill down pat. I also know that when I delegate things that it is my responsibility if they screw up. So I delegate the easy stuff and complete the rest on my own. Call me controlling but shit gets done and gets done right most of the time. Every now and again something slips through the cracks or in rare circumstances when it is not appropriate for me to control things, I let it go and hope for the best. And time and time again I am disappointed. Then I have to realize that what is easy to me is not easy to others. It is my fault that things didn't turn out right, or rather "the way I wanted them". I take a deep sigh and realize that I should have just handled things. It's not a big deal in the small picture, but I am not a small picture person - I always look at the whole forest, not just the trees. For me small events similar to the ones mentioned above only affirm my fears of delegation and NOT controlling things. I don't know what to do!! Should I just let go and let everything fall to shit?! Should I control more?! ARGH!!! I will now share something my dad wrote to me, it's what I read in times like this:
"The point I have been working toward, is that although you are one of the most brilliantly gifted persons I know in your strengths, you will never be able to fully attain alone, you need a team. Your team members are (in order of importance): your life partner, your family, your friends, your associates at work. Anytime you degrade any of your team members openly or in your mind and attitude you also degrade yourself. The closer they are to you on the team chart, the more it affects you. Anytime you see someone stumble in something you are strong in, like your dad misspelling a word or your boyfriend lacking a little organization, resist the urge to react critically of them. Because there are things you are weak in, like economics, and there are things they are strong in, even if it is only keeping their cool when you have lost yours."
"The point I have been working toward, is that although you are one of the most brilliantly gifted persons I know in your strengths, you will never be able to fully attain alone, you need a team. Your team members are (in order of importance): your life partner, your family, your friends, your associates at work. Anytime you degrade any of your team members openly or in your mind and attitude you also degrade yourself. The closer they are to you on the team chart, the more it affects you. Anytime you see someone stumble in something you are strong in, like your dad misspelling a word or your boyfriend lacking a little organization, resist the urge to react critically of them. Because there are things you are weak in, like economics, and there are things they are strong in, even if it is only keeping their cool when you have lost yours."
Thursday, June 30, 2005
8 Truths and 2 Lies Revealed
1. I think Marilyn Manson is sexy.
True - I admire his musical and artistic talent as well as his unique identity. I think his work is powerful. He is not afraid to break free of the Hollywood norm and that is a very respectful trait.
2. Birds stress me out.
BIRDS ARE FAT CREATURES THAT DON'T DO ANYTHING!!! THEY ALWAYS SIT AROUND IN THE MOST OBSCURE PLACES AND JUST SIT THERE AND DON'T DO ANYTHING!!! OR WHEN THEY ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING - IT'S WEIRD!!! AND THEY ARE ALWAYS IN CLUSTERS JUST MILLING AND DOING NOTHING!!!!
3. I failed math in high school.
This is true. I had to take Algebra I and II at the community college the summer after I graduated in order to get my diploma. And now look at me! HA!
4. My high school sweethart was Isis' father.
This is a big, fat negative. My high school sweethart was Brendon C. - a wonderful, gentle human being. Isis' father is Mike N. That's the nicest thing I can say about Mike.
5. I love love love Sex and the City.
Yes yes yes!! SATC is a great, entertaining yet somewhat realistic show that has great stories and connections and dynamic. I really feel like I am friends with those women - great, captivating show!!
6. I have matured and calmed down a lot in the past 2 years.
Believe it or not, this is true. It's actually not that hard to believe, most people tend to calm down and mature over the years with age and wisdom. Alas, I too am subject to this trend.
7. I get a pedicure every two weeks.
False!! I get a manicure every two weeks. If I could afford a pedicure both in dollars and time, then I would get one every two weeks, but I have never habitually received pedicures.
8. I am a Denver/Colorado native.
Word.
9. I am very active in my community and support a myriad of nonprofits, charities, and other volunteer projects.
This is true. I am a member of the Botanic Gardens, Colorado Mountain Club, and Compassion & Choices (as well as work there). I contribute my money to the aforementioned organizations as well as Denver Rescue Mission, Child Help USA, Donor Alliance, and a variety of other random charities at nonmaterial amounts (Children's Hospital, Susan B. Komen Fund, etc.). I have volunteered at the Botanic Gardens, Children's Hospital, Compassion & Choices, and Donor Alliance. Nonprofits are GGGGRRRRRR-E-A-T!!!!
10. Dane and I have been together going on 4 years.
We celebrated 3 full years together this year in Seattle in April when we visited our new home for the first time together. As we progress through the year, we are celebrating our 4th Easter, 4th of July, Halloween, Christmas, etc. It is quite fun to look back and reminence about what we did each year.
8 Truths and 2 Lies
1. I think Marilyn Manson is sexy.
2. Birds stress me out.
3. I failed math in high school.
4. My high school sweethart was Isis' father.
5. I love love love Sex and the City.
6. I have matured and calmed down a lot in the past 2 years.
7. I get a pedicure every two weeks.
8. I am a Denver/Colorado native.
9. I am very active in my community and support a myriad of nonprofits, charities, and other volunteer projects.
10. Dane and I have been together going on 4 years.
2. Birds stress me out.
3. I failed math in high school.
4. My high school sweethart was Isis' father.
5. I love love love Sex and the City.
6. I have matured and calmed down a lot in the past 2 years.
7. I get a pedicure every two weeks.
8. I am a Denver/Colorado native.
9. I am very active in my community and support a myriad of nonprofits, charities, and other volunteer projects.
10. Dane and I have been together going on 4 years.
Monday, June 27, 2005
To Be Bad
So I thought I was horribly bad with my diet this whole weekend and I felt guilty and blah blah and then I calculated everything out on my diet manager and while I broke my caloric limit, it wasn't anywhere NEAR what I thought it would be. Now if I had actually done my yoga on top of this - I probably would have been A-OK. But here's the break-thru, I can be a little bad here and there (in moderation) and still be okay. I satisfied my Taco Bell, Chinese food, and KFC craving and still kept within a decent range of my caloric intake - GGGGOOOO me!!!
Last weekend was a lot of fun. My intermediate class is killing me...and the other students apparently - the teacher let us go early on Thursday. I could have met Amy and Rhi for drinks but I am trying to watch my calories and I have NO money - they offered to pay, but I didn't even *hangs head and mumbles* have the money in gas to get there. I tried coercing them into Lodo's so I could go, but it didn't work. Oh well - wasn't meant to be. Instead I went home and completed my homework for Friday and Saturday. Then when that was done and I wasn't tired I decided to just sit in the quiet of the night and be. Not call anyone, not do anything, not think about the upcoming move or Dane or work or school. Just be. I listened to all the noises the night had to offer, paid attention to the details of the clouds, the moon, the planes crossing the sky, made myself aware of my inhales and exhales. Just when I was relaxed and calm my phone rings and its the girls wanting to know what I am doing. I am still broke and watching my weight so I decline the additional invite to go out with them. *sigh* To be young and not care - I want it back!!
Friday I watched my diet all day, consuming a grand total of 600 calories in food. That was only so I could consume a lot more in alcohol. I went over my limit, but not by much. I can't believe I had enough discipline to sit at Dave & Busters and only order a salad with no dressing. My roommates ordered burgers and ate fries and cake and I poked at a dry, flavorless salad. But in the end, I am happy - it shows I am really starting to do what it takes to lose weight. After much fun at D&B it was time to go to the Deadbeat. Rhi and I danced to Wolfschiem - formerly Dane and I's song (I am not sure how to grammatically say that correctly). Then we had fun and talked and danced. Barry (as in Barry White but not really Barry White) talked with us for a while and had fun. He is a Forensic Animater - he recreates accidents for insurance companies and other outside companies. He came back with us to the house and played a couple rounds of Taboo before I had to hit the hay. It wasn't quite a floor night but I did sleep on top of the covers.
I woke up Saturday morning (okay afternoon) to my cat in the CUTEST position in the world and a stomach about ready to go on strike. I rallied the troops and together we ordered from our favorite Chinese restaurant. Rhi and I prepared for our 4th season SATC-athon. The boys did their own thing and we watched almost every episode in the 4th season. We ate our Chinese food all throughout the day never really stopping for lunch or dinner, just constantly munching. We thought about showering (not together!), or maybe hanging out on the lawn, or doing something productive. Instead we decided to take a nap on the couch and "rest" before watching anymore episodes. That was 10:00 pm.
Next thing you know it was 11:30 am on Sunday - there Rhi and I are on the couch, cats and soda cans EVERYWHERE, Chinese food laying out, PBJ stains - it was bad. It looked like a parcel of 13 year olds spent the night, not two twenty-something women. We are so bad!!! Not wanting another day of doing nothing productive, Rhi and I decided to raid the house for any change lying around and hit Taco Bell. Then we spent the afternoon sunning ourselves at my parent's pool. Then, as Rhi said we "ate everything that wasn't nailed down". More Rhi than me though. Once we gorged ourselves and had family fun at my parents house we went home and actually cleaned up, I did some homework, we made plans to weed tomorrow. All in all a good, productive day.
It was a great weekend and even if I didn't accomplish everything on my "to-do" list - I accomplished a lot of nothing that I never seem to have time to pencil in and sometimes that's just what you need to do.
This week and weekend will be a tail spin!! Tonight and tomorrow is weed-pulling, homework, yoga, and nail night - trying to get ready for the weekend, which almost starts on Wednesday at 11:30 am for lunch at Lodo's and then a baseball game at Coors Field. Thursday is school and then Drew's birthday celebration at McDunnah's then off to pick up Mr. Man at midnight. Friday Dane and I will prepare for the garage sale and generally clean up the house for game night in the evening. Saturday we will make Dane order Chinese food and watch SATC S1, then probably go downtown in the evening. Sunday is a pool party and BBQ followed by the foam party at Pollyesther's. And so far we have nothing but relaxation and fun planned for the 4th. Probably an early night as Dane will need to be at the airport by 5 am and ready to work upon arrival in WA. I CAN'T WAIT!!!
Last weekend was a lot of fun. My intermediate class is killing me...and the other students apparently - the teacher let us go early on Thursday. I could have met Amy and Rhi for drinks but I am trying to watch my calories and I have NO money - they offered to pay, but I didn't even *hangs head and mumbles* have the money in gas to get there. I tried coercing them into Lodo's so I could go, but it didn't work. Oh well - wasn't meant to be. Instead I went home and completed my homework for Friday and Saturday. Then when that was done and I wasn't tired I decided to just sit in the quiet of the night and be. Not call anyone, not do anything, not think about the upcoming move or Dane or work or school. Just be. I listened to all the noises the night had to offer, paid attention to the details of the clouds, the moon, the planes crossing the sky, made myself aware of my inhales and exhales. Just when I was relaxed and calm my phone rings and its the girls wanting to know what I am doing. I am still broke and watching my weight so I decline the additional invite to go out with them. *sigh* To be young and not care - I want it back!!
Friday I watched my diet all day, consuming a grand total of 600 calories in food. That was only so I could consume a lot more in alcohol. I went over my limit, but not by much. I can't believe I had enough discipline to sit at Dave & Busters and only order a salad with no dressing. My roommates ordered burgers and ate fries and cake and I poked at a dry, flavorless salad. But in the end, I am happy - it shows I am really starting to do what it takes to lose weight. After much fun at D&B it was time to go to the Deadbeat. Rhi and I danced to Wolfschiem - formerly Dane and I's song (I am not sure how to grammatically say that correctly). Then we had fun and talked and danced. Barry (as in Barry White but not really Barry White) talked with us for a while and had fun. He is a Forensic Animater - he recreates accidents for insurance companies and other outside companies. He came back with us to the house and played a couple rounds of Taboo before I had to hit the hay. It wasn't quite a floor night but I did sleep on top of the covers.
I woke up Saturday morning (okay afternoon) to my cat in the CUTEST position in the world and a stomach about ready to go on strike. I rallied the troops and together we ordered from our favorite Chinese restaurant. Rhi and I prepared for our 4th season SATC-athon. The boys did their own thing and we watched almost every episode in the 4th season. We ate our Chinese food all throughout the day never really stopping for lunch or dinner, just constantly munching. We thought about showering (not together!), or maybe hanging out on the lawn, or doing something productive. Instead we decided to take a nap on the couch and "rest" before watching anymore episodes. That was 10:00 pm.
Next thing you know it was 11:30 am on Sunday - there Rhi and I are on the couch, cats and soda cans EVERYWHERE, Chinese food laying out, PBJ stains - it was bad. It looked like a parcel of 13 year olds spent the night, not two twenty-something women. We are so bad!!! Not wanting another day of doing nothing productive, Rhi and I decided to raid the house for any change lying around and hit Taco Bell. Then we spent the afternoon sunning ourselves at my parent's pool. Then, as Rhi said we "ate everything that wasn't nailed down". More Rhi than me though. Once we gorged ourselves and had family fun at my parents house we went home and actually cleaned up, I did some homework, we made plans to weed tomorrow. All in all a good, productive day.
It was a great weekend and even if I didn't accomplish everything on my "to-do" list - I accomplished a lot of nothing that I never seem to have time to pencil in and sometimes that's just what you need to do.
This week and weekend will be a tail spin!! Tonight and tomorrow is weed-pulling, homework, yoga, and nail night - trying to get ready for the weekend, which almost starts on Wednesday at 11:30 am for lunch at Lodo's and then a baseball game at Coors Field. Thursday is school and then Drew's birthday celebration at McDunnah's then off to pick up Mr. Man at midnight. Friday Dane and I will prepare for the garage sale and generally clean up the house for game night in the evening. Saturday we will make Dane order Chinese food and watch SATC S1, then probably go downtown in the evening. Sunday is a pool party and BBQ followed by the foam party at Pollyesther's. And so far we have nothing but relaxation and fun planned for the 4th. Probably an early night as Dane will need to be at the airport by 5 am and ready to work upon arrival in WA. I CAN'T WAIT!!!
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